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2. This "dignity" coffee mug.
Don't you even know dignity when you see it?!
3. This T-shirt inspired by Homer's muumuu.
I don't want to look like a weirdo. I'll just go with a muumuu.
4. This pretty special Milhouse/Alex Turner valentine's card.
5. And, of course, this one.
It says, "choo-choo-choose me". And there's a picture of a train...
6. This Globex Corporation T-shirt.
Homer, on your way out, if you want to kill somebody, it would help me a lot.
7. This sexy Mulder ID pin badge.
So I says, "Blue M&M, red M&M. They all wind up the same color in the end."
9. Or why not just get you and your family recreated in Simpsons form!
10. This highly sought after Bort licence plate.
We need more Bort license plates in the gift shop. I repeat, we are sold out of Bort license plates.
11. This phone case for the hottest new film of the summer.
Oh, you have got to be kidding, sir. First you think of an idea that has already been done. Then you give it a title that nobody could possibly like. Didn't you think this through?
12. And on the subject of hit movies, how about this T-shirt?
I saw this in a movie about a bus that had to SPEED around the city, keeping its SPEED over fifty. And if its SPEED dropped, the bus would explode! I think it was called...
16. This framed dictionary definition.
It's a perfectly cromulent word.
17. This hand-painted picture of Skinner and Chalmers enjoying some steamed hams in front of the aurora borealis.
It's an Albany expression.
18. This Springfield travel poster.
19. This "So You've Ruined Your Life" notebook.
Perhaps this pamphlet will prove helpful.
21. This brilliantly punny T-shirt.
I know one of you is responsible for this, so repeat after me: "If I withhold the truth, may I go straight to hell."
22. This hoodie from a prestigious school.
When I grow up, I'm going to Bovine University.
23. And finally, this phone case that'll make you cry whenever you look at it.
I keep them where I need the most cheering up.