How Awkward Are You?

If you're taking this quiz, you probably already know. But it's good to be sure.

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  1. Tick off all the things that make you feel awkward...

    Meeting new people
    Meeting people you already know
    Ordering food in a restaurant
    Eating food in front of people
    Answering the phone
    Making a call
    Being asked directions
    Asking for directions
    Shaking hands
    Hugging
    Kissing
    Not knowing whether to shake hands, hug or kiss
    Asking someone out
    Going on a date
    Making a move
    Being naked in front of someone
    Sex
    Talking in front of people
    People looking at you
    Looking at pictures of yourself
    Hearing recordings of your voice
    Watching yourself on video
    Having people sing "Happy Birthday" to you
    Watching rude scenes with your parents
    Eye contact
    Kissing in public
    Saying "I love you" in public
    Saying "I love you" in private
    Going to the gym
    Running in public
    High fiving
    Being invited to parties
    Getting your hair cut
    Tilting your head when getting your hair cut and not knowing when to stop tilting your head
    Making eye contact with people in the mirror when getting your hair cut
    Going clothes shopping
    Flirting
    Having your photo taken
    Complaining in a restuarant
    Singing
    Dancing
    Being early
    Being late
    Answering the phone on the bus
    Not knowing whether people on the tube are pregnant or overweight
    Having to pee during a flight
    Having to pee in a house you've never been to before
    Having to pee when you're at the cinema
    One on one meetings with your boss
    Asking for the bill
    Being asked to take a picture and just being scared you'll mess it up
    Greeting relatives
    Underwear shopping
    Swimming pool changing rooms
    Having to try on shoes in front of the shop assistant and just politely saying the shoes are great even though they really hurt
    Trying to get the bartender's attention
    Paying for stuff when there's a massive queue behind you
    Being talked to from the stage by a stand-up comedian
    Someone being a dick to you
    Someone being nice to you
    Eating alone in a restaurant
    Being in a lift with strangers
    Being anywhere with strangers
    Leaving a shop without buying anything
    Going for a poo, then someone going into the toilet right after you
    Going for a poo when there's someone else in the toilet
    Going for a poo pretty much ever
    The word "poo"
    Likewise "penis"
    And "vagina"
    Your parents talking to your friends
    Taking a quiz like this and realising just how awkward you are

How Awkward Are You?

Check out Smoothy McSmootherson over here! You're not awkward at all. How do you do it?! What is it like the go through life without hating yourself? Everyone you know wishes they could be a little more like you. Hell, so do we! Will you be our friend? Pleeeeease? No? Oh. Well, this is awkward...

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You're a bit awkward, but it could be a lot worse. You're essentially the Goldilocks of social anxiety. Just when you think you're gliding through life like some sort of Beyoncé/Ryan Gosling hybrid, along comes your inner Jennifer Lawrence to put you in your place. Oh well, it keeps you on your toes!

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I mean, you probably knew this was coming, but you're very, VERY awkward. Don't fear, all the best people are. Imagine how boring life must be for those poor people who don't make a fool of themselves fifteen times a day. Without people like you the world would be a much less entertaining place. Keep up the good work!

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