A guilty pleasure of mine? Perusing the Am I the Asshole subreddit.
Most of the time, it's a pretty easy line in the sand and the public fingers point firmly in one person's direction. Sometimes, however, you'll get a post where you're pretty clear about who the asshole is, but it's so bizarre that you genuinely struggle to wrap your head around the situation. The below falls squarely in that camp.
In the now-deleted post — which went viral on Twitter when Mother Jones reporter Abby Vesoulis tweeted about it — a man, who is not a pilot, is annoyed at his wife for introducing him by his actual job and not as a pilot. Yeah, I know — what?
Here's the full story according to Mr. Definitely-A-Pilot:
"My wife and I (together for five years, married for two, no kids) have an amazing, happy relationship. I can’t recall a single time we’ve ever argued to the point of a breakup or divorce. This issue, however, is causing me to reconsider the health of our relationship."
"Since my wife and I have been together, I have worked as a manager for a restaurant chain. I am an extremely passionate aviation enthusiast in my free time. I have spent thousands of dollars on flight textbooks, sim gear, and even built my own a330 setup."
"I have never actually flown a plane or started flight training, but I have considered it for a long time. Even though my skills are not a career, I still consider myself as adept or possibly more knowledgeable than the average pilot."
"That being said, here’s where the problem arises. My wife and I were invited to one of her male coworker's house for a barbecue. My wife is a senior software tech for a COVID startup. She’s worked there since 2020, a lucky catch after she was laid off from her previous job due to the virus. It was my first time meeting many of her now-close coworkers due to COVID and working from home. I had assumed she’d talked about me before, but as we were cycling through introductions I became less sure."
"We make our way down the line to the host of the party, a new male hire that she has grown platonically close with. We exchange casual conversation and Greg (host) asked what I do for a living. My wife chimes in with 'He manages a [insert fast food chain], it certainly comes with some benefits (I’m assuming she’s referring to free food),' in a voice that implied nothing was wrong with what she said. I very quickly corrected her and told him that I am a pilot. My wife already knows how insecure I am about my job and how I’d much rather be introduced by my hobby."
"I’ve earned the title of pilot through my 500+ hours on and sim and thousands of dollars put into my craft. I think it is incredibly disrespectful for her not to acknowledge my skills and training. Just because I don’t have the title of pilot on an overpriced piece of paper doesn’t mean I’m not a pilot."
"As we pack into the car to leave, the argument starts. She feels as if I don’t deserve my title as a pilot because I’m not professional. I told her she is completely insensitive to the work I’ve done and she will never understand what it’s like to study so much. She’s currently on the couch as I type this. Am I really the asshole for asking to be respected?"
Unsurprisingly, people did not hold back. If this dude thought he was going to have his aviator ego tickled, he thought wrong! Here's what some people had to say on his status as a pilot:
@abbyvesoulis If you have: • No experience flying a plane • Have not gone to or even begun flight school You are: • Not a Pilot • Not more knowledgeable than the average pilot
@abbyvesoulis This sounds like a him problem if he's too insecure to tell people what he actually does. I'd you've never flown a plane or gotten a pilot's license...guess what, you're not a pilot.
Others had a real awakening as to their "true" job titles...
@abbyvesoulis I've put over 500 hours into various modded playthroughs of Skyrim, and I can't believe my partner won't respect my title of Dovah-Kiin. It takes a lot to put together a playable stealth archer build.
@abbyvesoulis I am very excited to hear that due to my many hard-earned hours playing Arkham Asylym on the PS4, I am (by his logic) Batman. #FearTheNight
A lot were confused as to why he'd answer a question about what he does for a living with something he does as a hobby, and not what he does for a living:
@abbyvesoulis Setting aside for the moment … well, all of THAT — how is “I’d much rather be introduced by my hobby” relevant when the question is what you do for a living? “So, what do you do for a living, Kevin?” “Never mind that, Greg — let me tell you what I’ve built in my basement.”
@iridium_tea @abbyvesoulis The question was, “What do you do for a living.” The answer is NOT “pilot.” That is is HOBBY, not his JOB. Also, he uses a SIMULATOR. He’s not even flying real planes. He essentially plays a flying video game and wants to be called “pilot.”
And some were in shock at how the guy was not only delusional about his own position, but dismissive about his wife's too:
I think the part that really gets me is that she’s a senior software engineer and he says “she will never understand what it's like to study so much.” Ummmm 🤔
But in the end, whether you think this post was exaggerated or not...I think we can all agree that there are people out there just like him:
@abbyvesoulis The “can’t be real” crowd needs to acknowledge how lucky they are that none of their friends married some totally yikesadoodle wacko. You see one super bizarre controlling weirdo and then you too, like Fox Mulder, will believe.