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18 Fuckboys Who Completely Failed At Being Fuckboys

"If you were a potato I'd have sex with you."

1. If you're gonna be a fuckboy, at least try to construct a proper sentence.

2. Maybe get another fuckboy to proofread your messages.

3. If you're gonna use the ol' "I must have typed that in my sleep" excuse, at least make it worth it.

4. And know that autocorrect is not your friend!

5. If you're gonna be a fuckboy, never reveal why you are a fuckboy.

6. Fuckboys often get to the point quickly, so don't go overboard with your opening line.

7. And for the LOVE OF GOD make sure you get it right the first time!

8. Never ever say "Holy garbanzo beans".

9. Or "dingleling".

10. Incest is never cool. Even fuckboys know that.

11. And JFC, do not talk about having sex with a potato!

12. Or your dog!

13. Basically please just avoid dragging family members or pets into your fuckboy life, okay?

14. Make sure you follow through with your lines, don't half-ass being a fuckboy!

15. And whatever you do, don't repeat yourself.

16. Always make it clear that you're a fuck-boy, and not say, a really weird perverted cat.

17. Don't be overly persistent, know when you have failed!

18. And finally, reflect privately.

H/T this excellent Tumblr : straightwhiteboystexting.