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18 Real AF Problems That Only British People Have

Can't get your mates to come to the pub? Photoshop 5 pints and tell them a free round is waiting for them.

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1. Having to think of crafty ways to get your mates to come to the pub:

2. But also having to prove that you don't live at one:

3. Because we're utterly obsessed with 'Spoons:

This is literally the worst poem ever written

4. Having the constant fear that that there won't be enough booze:

5. Fry-ups being ruined by hipsters:

6. And being given a half-arsed tea:

Mum forgot to do Garlic Bread with tea, more like chilli con cannot be arsed, Jane.

7. Because garlic bread is a national treasure and should be treated as such:

FaceTiming my oven so I can see when my garlic bread is done.

8. Awkward small talk with your cabbie:

wis in a taxi going to work n the cunt asked "so wit is it ye do?" a replied "work in a bank mate you?" Just let me oot here mate al walk it

9. Measures being absurdly small in Britain meaning that going on holiday equals instantly getting trashed:

asked for a vodka n coke last night in menorca n look at the fuckin state ae that, that's a pint glass, that's atte…

10. Misunderstanding one another because of our many dialects:

Boy behind the bar said to jason "Β£4 a pint Β£8 a pitcher" jason goes "were no wanting a photo just a pint please" πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

11. And the ever-lasting North/South divide:

londoner: hi northerner: hiGH like your house prices πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ honestly you couldn't pay me to live in london πŸ™…πŸ™… enjoy your smog-infested bubble πŸ‘‹πŸ»

12. TV schedules:

ITV2: We Played The Mummy Returns 3 times this month ITV2 to ITV2: Play it again

13. Having to be polite at all times:

Everyone in England - Person A - 'alright mate, how's it going?' Person B - (lying) 'yeah good, you?' Person A - (also lying) 'yeah good'

14. Too polite:

When you ask "Who wants a brew?" and suddenly you're making 5 cups of tea, 2 nutty mochas and a tall, non-fat latte with caramel drizzle.

15. Because we can't handle the truth:

Customers just asked me what perfume I've got on, didn't have the heart to tell her I'd febreze'd myself so I said it were Marc Jacobs ffs

16. Having to come up with different ways to say thank you because we say it so goddamn much:

When you follow someone through multiple doors

17. Soap storylines reaching an embarrassing level:

LMFAO Hollyoaks writers need to be stopped😭

18. And our reality TV shows taking it a step too far:

I’m dead πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚