1. "You're sooo lucky. You get to do whatever you want all day."
2. "It must be amaaaazing being your own boss."


Totally. It's less amazing being my own janitor, office manager, secretary, mailman, and sole colleague.
"So, when are you getting a real job?"
Yes, in particular my favorite pastime is wallowing in my profound lack of human contact.
Totally. It's less amazing being my own janitor, office manager, secretary, mailman, and sole colleague.
NO NEVER I'M A SERIOUS PROFESSIONAL. All right, maybe once in a while.
OK. Do you also wish you could be so rattled by ennui that you start talking to your pillows?
And I'm so jealous you have any motivation to keep up your personal grooming habits. *Braids leg hair*
No, I think you're confused. I don't have less work. I just do it someplace else.
No, again, I don't think you... *Sigh* Never mind.
Trust me, I wish I could too.
Wow. Your Nobel Prize for psychology must be on its way.
Please, tell me. What is it like to live unaware of the existence of television and the World Wide Web?
Hahahahahahahahhahahahhahahhaha! Yes.
Did it hurt when they surgically removed the part of your brain that's responsible for tact and subtlety?
Sssshhhh! I'm trying to keep it secret that I have a team of house elves who come over and do my job for me!
Um. How do you think I get back and forth from my fridge to my chair 50 times a day?
I do, though. Unless we aren't counting the voices in my head.
No, no. On weekends I sit on the same couch I do every day, but with renewed purpose and vigor.
Uhhh...Yes...Totally... I do. Yup.
I think I kinda do.