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Nov 6, 2014

This Ridiculously Blunt Woman Is Here To Tell You Why Small Penises Are The Best

#TeamLittleDick. NSFW due to lots of blunt talk about dicks.

  1. First things first. Do you have a big dick?

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First things first. Do you have a big dick?
  1.  
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    Yup.
  2.  
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    ...No.
  3.  
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    I would if I had one.

I hope you answered no, because comedian Monique Anderson is here to "go deep" on why bigger is NOT better.

Heh heh.

View this video on YouTube

youtube.com

In the video, which went viral online and was featured on Playboy's website and Howard Stern's show, Anderson explains that she feels like "big dicks weaken me as a woman."

"I like to suck a dick where I feel like I'm in power, OK?" she says.

She adds that well-endowed guys like to "put people in pretzels."

"I dont need to be thinking about this big dick still stuck in my backbone," she says. "I don't have time for that."

Ain't nobody got time for that.

Secondly, she says, going to town on a guy with a pocket rocket can take a turn for the worst if she's had too much to drink.

"I be leaving the club, we be having a good time, I'll be tipsy, then he whip that big ass dick out! I'm gonna throw up because the motherfucker's too goddamn big!"

"I don't want to suck dick and feel like that I'm going to throw up on the dick. It's too big! It's too wide! Big ego like Beyonce."

Basically, Anderson says she's "#TeamLittleDick" all the way.

I think this could be really big for guys who...aren't really big.

BuzzFeed has reached out to Anderson to elaborate on #TeamLittleDick.

  1. In conclusion, are big peens done for?

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In conclusion, are big peens done for?
  1.  
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    Duh, they're so last year.
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    Um...never.
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    How did I get in this post?
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    I was looking for the cats.
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    Seriously, can someone point me to the cats.

h/t Gawker