7. Baking five different cake layers in five different colors and then carefully slicing and arranging them so as to create one super-creepy clown cake:
Is this for children? Do you realize a) how little they will appreciate your painstaking application of food coloring and b) how goddamn scary that clown is?
8. Layering 1 million Jell-O flavors to create this monstrosity:
In the time it takes you to make this, you could also:
- write a novel
- raise a child
- learn Swedish
- go to the moon and bring back some cool moon rocks
- write a second novel, this time in Swedish
17. Hiding candy inside these elaborately constructed piñata cookies:
Do you want to know how many steps there are in this how-to slideshow? 30. There are 30 steps. Do you want to know how many steps there are in purchasing and eating a bag of piñata-free M&M’s? Two.
- Top Mexican soccer player Alan Pulido has been kidnapped outside of his hometown in Tamaulipas, a high-crime state.
- Yep. Marco Rubio said he's sorry for implying Donald Trump has a small penis.
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