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18 Times Restoration Hardware Went Too Damn Far

An $800 chalkboard? Is this real life?

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1. When they pretended this planter is inspired by "18th century French rocaille style" instead of admitting it's inspired by the Perfect Tortilla Pan.

2. The time they tried to sell you a bunch of blank books for $125.

"During the French Revolution, reading was forbidden in order to prevent the spread of rebellious stories about the monarchy. During that time, printers produced couverture muette or 'mute books' – books with blank covers – to avoid detection. Paying homage to those historic 18th-century tomes, these exquisite books are entirely crafted by hand, from the torn paper and simple cover boards to the naturally stained linen bindings and timeworn labels. The only difference? The pages within are blank."Nope. But if you really want some blank books, here's a DIY version that costs like zero dollars.
restorationhardware.com

"During the French Revolution, reading was forbidden in order to prevent the spread of rebellious stories about the monarchy. During that time, printers produced couverture muette or 'mute books' – books with blank covers – to avoid detection. Paying homage to those historic 18th-century tomes, these exquisite books are entirely crafted by hand, from the torn paper and simple cover boards to the naturally stained linen bindings and timeworn labels. The only difference? The pages within are blank."

Nope. But if you really want some blank books, here's a DIY version that costs like zero dollars.

3. When they tried to make a $745 chalkboard happen.

Though if you have just $349, you could get the small one. Downside: then all your friends will know you're poor.
restorationhardware.com

Though if you have just $349, you could get the small one. Downside: then all your friends will know you're poor.

4. When they assumed that anyone who could buy this "industrial" $395 chalkboard would ~naturally~ refer to eggs as "oeufs."

5. When they created a $4000 vintagey foosball table.

6. The day they decided what you really need is a $179 version of Connect Four.

If you really want to class up Connect Four, you could do this wooden version from Etsy, which costs approximately $150 less than the RH one.
restorationhardware.com

If you really want to class up Connect Four, you could do this wooden version from Etsy, which costs approximately $150 less than the RH one.

7. When they committed this crime against both horses and good taste.

Are those legs? Arms? WHAT IS HAPPENING?It's currently on sale for $395, so now's the time to snatch it up!
restorationhardware.com

Are those legs? Arms? WHAT IS HAPPENING?

It's currently on sale for $395, so now's the time to snatch it up!

8. When they offered to let you pay $1195 for the privilege of making your home look just like basically every freshman girl's dorm room.

9. When they decided that most people have an extra $70 to spend on a vintage racing cap and coordinating goggles.

10. But how else are they going to look stylish when riding around in their "le mans pedal car"?

That's actually a fantastic "fuck you" to Power Wheels, tbh.
rhbabyandchild.com

That's actually a fantastic "fuck you" to Power Wheels, tbh.

11. Your kiddo can also fuel up at this $149 pretend gas pump.

lololol at the idea of an RH toddler getting "regular" gas.
rhbabyandchild.com

lololol at the idea of an RH toddler getting "regular" gas.

12. When they made this concrete "play table" for your kids that costs $799.

Yeah, no.

13. When they offered a way make your dogs look like rich ladies vacationing in Aspen.

14. When they said the perfect way to "reassure little ones bound for dreamland" is a nightlight that costs $129.

15. The time they pretended you would like to replace your plastic safety goggles with this fancy pair.

Though at $24, I suppose you actually could.
restorationhardware.com

Though at $24, I suppose you actually could.

16. When they called a bulletin board a "pinboard" so they could charge $400 for it.

17. When they said this faux fur sleeping bag for children offered "unsurpassed snuggliness" and chose and chose to call the color 'Wolf'.

But maybe I'm just jealous they don't make them for grown-ups.
rhbabyandchild.com

But maybe I'm just jealous they don't make them for grown-ups.

18. When they called their catalogues "source books" and mailed the stack of them (which weighed about 20 pounds) to everyone who has ever so much as driven by a Restoration Hardware.

The best things at three price points