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Holy Mary, Mother Of God, Keeps Having Her Breastfeeding Pics Removed From Instagram

She was going through a Baroque Renaissance phase.

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And she was like, "Seriously, Jesus, you have to eat!"

Virgin and Child- Master of the Legend of Saint Ursula (Late 15th Century) / Via metmuseum.org

If you're skinny, I go to jail. Do you understand?

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When she agreed to watch John the Baptist for a couple of hours and couldn't drum up one divine iota of fake enthusiasm for his recap of that morning's episode of "Jake and the Neverland Pirates."

Madonna and Child with the Young Saint John the Baptist- Cosimo Rosselli (ca. 1490) / Via metmuseum.org

Wait, who?

When a cherub tried to get in on the action and baby J was having none of it. NONE. OF. IT.

Virgin and Child with an Angel- Antonio Allegri da Correggio (1520) / Via antoniodacorreggio.org

Cool story, bro. Could ya give us a little space? Thanks.

The Blessed Virgin reports that all she wants is to capture the beauty and wonder of this special time in her life and share it with her friends and family, saying "I guess I just don't understand how the mostly male artists (shout-out to my girl, Artemisia!) of Renaissance Europe under the patronage of the Catholic Church understood this but the community content reviewers at Instagram don't."

Amen, sister.

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