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1. A Shibari Mini Halo that is so strong and so powerful, it may be the key to overthrowing the patriarchy.
2. A uniquely shaped Pixie that'll hug your clit like an old friend. After all, the best lovers are often friends first!
3. The Satisfyer 2 whose sole purpose in life is to give you multiple orgasms. It's also fully functional underwater in case your ultimate fantasy is to get eaten out by a mermaid.
4. A cute little bullet vibe that will break your orgasm record without breaking the bank! It's also USB rechargeable, preventing you from having to run to the store for vibrator batteries for the third time this week.
5. A tried and true Hitachi Magic Wand whose merits have been lauded for so long, I'm shocked it doesn't have a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame.
6. A G spot rabbit vibrator you've dreamt about owning since you were introduced to Sex and the City. This cutie will be there to support you while you maintain your successful law career, marry a bartender named Steve, break up with him, then ultimately make up and move in together in a Brooklyn brownstone.
7. A vibrating cock ring that'll turn any humdrum penis into a Super Penis. Get that dick a cape, it's in The Avengers now.
8. A sleek Echo Violet whose ergonomic curves are so chic, you may want to buy a second to keep on display.
9. A Mona 2 that is powerful yet whisper quiet, so you don't have to tell you roommates a weird lie about how your room is full of bees every time you masturbate.
10. A Lulu 8 cordless wand that will turn you on by looking at its curves alone. Who's that sexy mama peeking out of your bedside table? Oh, it's just your vibrator.
11. A vibrating anal plug for anyone looking to make their banal anal play a little more ~high voltage~.
12. A versatile three-motor vibrator that can be used in any number of configurations regardless of the sex or number of participants. Radical acceptance has never been so sexy.
13. A silicone clitoral toy that is BASICALLY A VIBRATING TONGUE. "Tracing the ABCs" or whatever these clowns have been doing just can't compete.
14. A Tango, the rechargable bullet vibe by crowd fave We-Vibe, proving once and for all that very big orgasms can ~come~ in extremely small packages.
15. The Girl's Best Friend, which truly lives up to its name! Go everywhere together! Make friendship bracelets! Finish each others sentences! Finish each other off! Wait, what...?
16. A vibrating silicone bullet egg perfect for public play. Slip it in and slip the remote to a partner. Running Sunday errands has never been so *spicy*.
17. A 3-in-1 prostate massager and vibrator to treat that bootay to a little pleasure. Butts work hard, and they should play hard too.
18. A hardworking multipurpose toy that can stimulate the clit, g-spot, AND nipples. That's the sex toy equivalent of working three jobs to get yourself through college. The American dream!
19. A splurge-worthy Soraya by Lelo that gives you a ~blended~ clitoral and g-spot orgasm even Amber Rose can get behind.
Let's be real, you can never have enough sex toys:
And because, just to reiterate one more time, LUBE LUBE LUBE: