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26 Reasons To Fall In Love With A Sheffielder

Wanna sleep with common people?

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1. First of all there's the irresistible accent.

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Resistance to our dulcet tones is as futile as saying "the" is in Sheffield.

2. And we definitely have the most affectionate slang.

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Date someone from Sheffield, and they'll call you "petal" all the time.

3. We're even adorable when we're insulting you.

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What do you mean we sound more cute than mad?

4. We produce brooding romantics with great hair who write beautiful music. Whether you like the more mature gent...

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Hello, Richard Hawley.

5. ...or the younger guy.

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Arctic Monkey Alex Turner proving that Sheffield is the quiff and leather jacket capital of the UK.

6. And on top of being incredibly sexy, we're chuffin' hilarious.

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Whether we're laughing at our own jokes or someone else's, nothing can beat that dry Sheffield wit.

7. We're especially good at puns.

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See also: Wok This Way, Balti Towers and Kumquat May (RIP).

8. We definitely know a good countryside pub for a weekend lunch.

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Yeah, that's a pretty average Sheffield pub scene.

9. And if you like beer, we're the real ale capital of the UK.

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Because nothing says, "I love you" like a well-kept barrel.

10. We've got thighs of steel thanks to all the hills.

If your S.O. lives anywhere near Hagg Hill, they definitely have thighs that can crack coconuts.
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If your S.O. lives anywhere near Hagg Hill, they definitely have thighs that can crack coconuts.

11. But no matter what our size, we're all pretty confident with our bodies.

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If the Full Monty proved anything, it's that there's a market for every body type in Sheffield.

12. Three little words: Proper. Yorkshire. Puddings.

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And if you date one of us, we'll make 'em for you.

13. When we talk about our special sauce, we're being entirely serious.

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What else could anyone possibly be referring to?

14. There are plenty of spots for romantic photo ops.

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So if your Sheffield S.O. takes you back home, you'll always look good.

15. In fact, it's almost embarrassing how photogenic this place is.

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Date a Sheffielder, improve your selfie game.

16. And we can even take you to a place where you can pose with an IRL polar bear.

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Meet Snowy; South Yorkshire's finest and furriest.

17. We're upfront about our faults.

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In a charmingly self-deprecating way, of course.

18. We don't wear coats on nights out, so you'll never have to worry about queueing for the cloakroom come kicking-out time.

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No cloakroom queue = £1 saved and off to Kebabish quicker than those chumps who prioritise being warm.

19. We're ludicrously proud of our hometown.

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And we'll give a reyt clip 'round lug'oil to any gobshite who has 'owt bad to say about us.

20. Some say tight, we say "more money for the things that matter". Like beer and chips.

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If you're lucky enough to date someone from Sheffield, you'll quickly learn how to be savvy with your cash.

21. We know how to make even the most basic meal special.

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Fry-up in a pint-sized castle, anyone?

22. We love a drink, so you'll never be the drunkest one in the couple.

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50p shots at Corporation have a lot to answer for.

23. There's no need for airs and graces around us.

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It's scientifically impossible to have an ego when you've spent your entire life being called a daft apeth by your mum.

24. We'll literally talk to anyone.

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We're friendly to a fault. On the bus, in the post office queue, in the bogs... most Sheffielders can't leave the house without meeting at least new two BFFs.

25. Even our graffiti is centred around romance.

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Pete McKee's "The Snog" mural at Fagan's is a prime example.

26. And if things go really well, you're guaranteed an excellent gift on your 11th wedding anniversary.

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