19 Bollywood Tropes That Would Be Weird In Real Life

This is why you can blame Hindi films for your skewed sense of reality.

1. Maa ki supernatural senses.

FilmyKeeday / Via filmykeeday.com

That thing you do when you’re alone? Imagine if she could sense it.

2. All girls’ hair constantly blowing in the wind. Even while indoors.

Sony Music India Vevo / Via youtube.com

You’re in a nightclub. Where is the gust of wind coming from?

3. And doing a 180 degree hair-flip in normal mundane situations.

Next time, I’ll come stand in front of you so you don’t have to turn.

4. Using animals as messengers of love.

Imaan Sheikh / Via imaansheikh.wordpress.com

A kabootar delivering a first pyar ki first chitthi. Tuffy the dog being given way too much responsibility to drive the plot forward. A CGI talking parrot who acts better than Hrithik Roshan. (OK so maybe the animals are just a Sooraj Barjatya thing.)

5. The one person that you don’t want hearing your secret constantly standing within earshot.

Pulkit Datta / Via youtube.com

Protip: Next time you want to share your deep, dark secret, take a quick gander around the room first.

6. Everyone moving in perfect sync without any planning involved.

It’s fun at first, but then it quickly becomes creeptastic.

7. Romancing on snow-capped mountains in barely any clothing.

Pulkit Datta / Via youtube.com

No, kids, being stranded on a giant block of ice wearing a very thin sari and singing in slow motion is NOT a good date idea.

8. 5-star customer service by a host of gods and goddesses.

Pulkit Datta / Via youtube.com

Things not going your way? Head to nearest God-like representation, pray (preferably with tears and desperation), cue loud bells/aarti/hymns, and CHAMATKAR! Problem conveniently solved in next scene!

9. Your wedding being literally the saddest day of your life.

Venus Movies / Via youtube.com

Wedding or funeral? Who can tell!

10. Rain functioning as a powerful aphrodisiac that leads to instantaneous sexytime.

YRF / Via youtube.com

Also, pneumonia. And wet socks. Think about that.

11. Instant baby making.

It’s astonishing that the one and only time the guy and girl have sex in the movie must inevitably lead to becoming maa of tumhara bachcha. Fertility ki jai ho!

12. Walking In slow motion.

YRF / Via youtube.com

Indian Standard Time is calculated based on how long it takes for the Bollywood star to walk a few feet.

13. Actions that defy physics… And logic.

FilmyKeeday / Via blogger.com

Your airborne buddy may have just vaporized the enemy but I assure you, he can’t see you.

14. Handling emotional confrontations and conflicts by singing and dancing.

Pulkit Datta / Via youtube.com

They dance because they have a boo in common… And a motive for murder.

15. Every single person you know being an incredibly talented and over-eager singer and dancer.

Paagal Subtitle / Via paagalsubtitle.tumblr.com

Might I suggest a sedative?

16. Declaring love via nonsensical lyrical metaphors.

Another Saurav / Via instagram.com

I’m sorry, you want to do what? * Files restraining order. *

17. Teleporting to foreign locales for quick song and dance routines.

Pulkit Datta / Via youtube.com

Okay, this one would be kind of awesome. Enter settings for musical number teleportation: Me + Deepika Padukone + Beaches of Fiji + Romantic song + Dancing seals in the background. Go!

18. Ridiculous and dramatic entrances, no matter where you’re going.

There has to be a more comfortable way of commuting to work every morning.

19. And your name being sung in the background music every time you enter a room.

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