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Posted on May 8, 2017

15 Icky Questions To Ask Your Guy Friends (If You Dare...)

There's icky and then there's ICKY.

  1. 1. Do you pee in the shower?

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1. Do you pee in the shower?
  1.  
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    Yes, me and every other guy on this planet.
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    I prefer to hold it in, but sometimes when you gotta go, you gotta go...
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    No, are you insane?!
  1. 2. And in the sink?

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2. And in the sink?
  1.  
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    It happens...
  2.  
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    Yes, but only in case of extreme urgency...
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    That's disgusting!
  1. 3. How long is the longest you've gone without changing your underwear?

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3. How long is the longest you've gone without changing your underwear?
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    1 day.
  2.  
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    2 days.
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    3 days.
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    A week.
Disney / Via giphy.com
  1. 4. When you go to the bathroom...

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4. When you go to the bathroom...
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    I pull up my fly before going out.
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    I leave the bathroom before completely finishing zipping up my fly.
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    I often forget to zip it back up.
  1. 5. Have you ever gone number 2 and then taken the time to appreciate how it smells?

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5. Have you ever gone number 2 and then taken the time to appreciate how it smells?
  1.  
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    Honestly no, you're completely insane.
  2.  
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    Yep, okay, I admit it, I have done this before.
  1. 6. Have you ever taken advantage of the fact that you're alone in a public place to fart loudly?

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6. Have you ever taken advantage of the fact that you're alone in a public place to fart loudly?
  1.  
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    You read me like an open book.
  2.  
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    Again, you are completely insane.
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    Okay, I admit, I've done this, yes. BUT JUST ONCE.
NBC / Via giphy.com
  1. 7. When you have a cold, what do you use to blow your nose?

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7. When you have a cold, what do you use to blow your nose?
  1.  
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    Um... tissues? Obviously.
  2.  
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    Toilet paper. It's cheaper.
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    The sleeve of my shirt.
  4.  
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    Anything within reach, even a dirty shirt. Sorry, not sorry.
  1. 8. What if you're too lazy to take a shower?

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8. What if you're too lazy to take a shower?
  1.  
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    So I don't shower? Too bad for the person sitting next to me on the subway.
  2.  
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    I just put on extra deodorant.
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    I spray myself with extra cologne. More effective.
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    I TAKE A SHOWER, FOR GOD'S SAKE!
  1. 9. Have you ever sniffed your fingers after putting your hand in your pants?

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9. Have you ever sniffed your fingers after putting your hand in your pants?
  1.  
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    Always ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
  2.  
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    Are you a police officer? Yes, it happens...
  3.  
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    I did it once. I will never do it again.
  4.  
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    No, no, and no. You are much too icky for me.
FOX / Via giphy.com
  1. 10. Have you ever peed in a bottle?

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10. Have you ever peed in a bottle?
  1.  
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    I admit to everything. The bathroom was too far away. I'm sorry.
  2.  
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    Yep, and I'm not even sorry about it. It was funny!
  3.  
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    I tried... and I didn't succeed. Never again.
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    Upon my word, BuzzFeed!
  1. 11. After peeing, you wash your hands...

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11. After peeing, you wash your hands...
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    Systematically.
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    Not if I "didn't touch" it.
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    If I remember/have time.
  1. 12. For you, lifting the toilet seat is...

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12. For you, lifting the toilet seat is...
  1.  
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    A habit.
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    A chore.
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    A thing that I forget to do half the time.
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    Something I've just learned I'm expected to do.
Warner Bros. Television / Via giphy.com
  1. 13. Have you ever eaten your boogers?

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13. Have you ever eaten your boogers?
  1.  
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    Um... yes, when I was 4. Never since.
  2.  
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    Yep, of course. How am I supposed to know if it's good or bad if I don't taste it?
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    Yep. I admit, it's my favorite dish.
  4.  
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    Excuse me???
  1. 14. How long is the longest you've gone wearing the same pair of jeans?

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14. How long is the longest you've gone wearing the same pair of jeans?
  1.  
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    4 days in a row without washing them.
  2.  
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    5 days in a row without washing them.
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    A whole week without washing them.
  4.  
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    2 weeks without washing them.
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    A month without washing them.
  1. 15. How do you deal with that last little droplet of pee?

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15. How do you deal with that last little droplet of pee?
  1.  
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    I always fight it.
  2.  
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    I have long since abandoned the fight against this. Now, I just let it drip quietly out into my underwear.

This post was translated from French.

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