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What Kind Of Thanksgiving Family Do You Belong To?

Not everyone celebrates the holiday in the same way.

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    Spend some time catching up with my family.
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    Go hang out with my old friends.
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    Get home and immediately start bickering with someone, anyone.
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    Do that traditional thing where you throw a frozen turkey through someone's window.
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    Sleep in as late as I possibly can.
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    Help out in preparing the big meal.
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    Watch a lot of TV – parades, sports, marathons, whatever.
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    Chant to invoke the "spirit of Thanksgiving" in a room lit only by festive Yankee Candles.
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    That thing where someone gets to break the wishbone.
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    Pouring an entire thing of cranberry sauce over the head of the youngest person in the family and everyone yells stuff like "haw haw, you're a cranberry BABY!!!"
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    Getting in some kind of heated stupid argument.
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    The loser of the Thanksgiving morning coin toss having to sleep with a pillow stuffed with leftover mashed potatoes.
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    Say a prayer thanking God for our family, health, and food.
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    The winner of the Thanksgiving spelling bee gets to have their meal first, sitting alone at the dining room table while the rest of the family and assorted guests must look on until they are finished.
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    Sit silently, avoiding eye contact.
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    Decorate our Thanksgiving smocks at the crafts table.
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    Stuffing
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    Yams with Marshmallows
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    Yellowish Spiced Mush
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    Green Beans
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    The most polarizing political topics imaginable.
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    Cheerful, lighthearted stuff.
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    We go around the table harshly criticizing one another's weaknesses and failures.
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    We're a pretty open and cool family, so it's mostly stuff about our sickest, most perverse obsessions.
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    Nah, we're not that kind of family.
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    A glass of wine at dinner, but not much beyond that.
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    We all drink until we are utterly wasted.
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    We have an elaborate drinking game throughout the day. Shots! Shots! Shots!
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    Get together and watch TV.
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    Take the fight outside.
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    Gather the bones from the turkey carcass and head up to the roof for a "bone toss."
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    Immediately move on to eating pies.
 
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