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16 People You Will Find At House Parties Represented By Beautiful Dogs

It's the Halloweekend and odds are you have either been at a house party, going to a party, or suffering through the sounds of one next door. We have a look at some of the typical characters you will always find at these shindigs, but the twist is they are dogs.

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1. That One Really Enthusiastic Guy


Why is this person so happy to be at the party? Maybe they've been stuck in a job they hate, or an extended project keeping them indoors, like a PHD. Maybe they have been trapped in the Andes for the last four years, eating the frozen flesh of their fellow plane-crash victims, staying sane by looking forward to all the pleasures of home, like parties. More specifically, your party. Catchphrases include: 'Wow' and 'This is the best time I've had in four years, because I was a cannibal.'

2. Guy Who Wants to Meet Everyone


This person is generally beloved by everyone. They are fascinating conversationalists and generally hold court in a dappled corner of the house, telling whimsical stories and holding gentle debates. They love meeting new people, and are excessively fascinated by whatever shitty thing you do with your life. Why are they so great, so interested? The answer: identity theft.

3. Person Who Turns Up Already Drunk


Maybe they've been multitasking parties, maybe they are trying to overcome their crippling fear of social engagements with a little Dutch courage/ bottle of vodka. But they are often the first one to turn into:

4. The One Who Falls Asleep Weirdly Early


Sometimes they get a bed, sometimes they have to curl up on a pile of dirty washing, that's life man, ying and yang. Nobody will like how chipper they are the next morning, but they also have dicks drawn on their face.

5. The One Who Starts Out Really Strongly...


And then ends the night doing something awful. They will often start off as That One Really Enthusiastic Guy but end up as That One Who Walked Through a Plate Glass Window.

6. That Person Who Wants Everyone to Dance


I don't care that Ignition Remix is on, I am having a wonderful conversation about taxes, leave me alone. Peer pressure isn't just about trying to get people to smoke, guy. Stop trying to make me dance.

This person is never alone, because they will swiftly be joined by:

9. Person Who Just Wants to Talk


The more alcohol inserted into their body, the more the volume and pace rises. Often seen talking less assertive people into a corner, where they will crumple, broken and sad underneath the weight of opinions and facts that this person has shouted directly into their face.

11. That Person Who Keeps Hitting on People But Nobody is Interested


At best this person is cute and clueless, at worst sex pests. If they are sex pests, don't be OK with this. This is not cool. You are legitimately allowed to ask Spiderman for help. But whatever you do, don't get this person involved:

13. The One Who Drinks All The Booze


By the end of the night this person is four litres of whiskey that have acquired limbs and hair and something vaguely resembling the ability to walk and talk, breathing toxic plumes of pure alcohol, yet never, ever being sated until they are claimed by blessed unconsciousness.

14. Mission Drunk


Bored with the discussion about Miley Cyrus and her bold pants, dissatisfied with the sloppy dance floor, this person will rally a cohort of drunks to undertake a mission like an inebriated version of Ocean's 11. This usually means restocking the booze or buying a lemon or stealing a pot plant and will often end in disaster.

15. Really Intense Guy Who Inexplicably Ate a Handful of Mushrooms


Has trouble with doors, will often go and lie next to the person who passed out early and whisper upsetting things to them about the universe.

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