23 Things That Only Happen At Latino Birthday Parties
"There's frosting in my nose."
Your parties would always take place in either a park or someone's backyard.
And if it was at a house, this would always be the parking situation throughout the entire neighborhood.
The party invitation would always say 5 p.m., but people wouldn't begin to trickle in until 7 or 8.
You would see family members you never knew existed and people you've never met.
And even though it was your birthday, you were forced to greet them anyway...or else.
There was more than likely a bounce house you could get wild in.
And sometimes your primos got a little too wild and tipped the damn thing over.
Or they thought they'd be payasos by making it deflate...ON PURPOSE.
The adults would create their own fun by buying a lifetime supply of liquor and beer.
And a group of guys would sit around in some corner drinking every last drop.
This of course then proved to be a little too much for some of your uncles.
Your family would make enough food to feed an entire country.
And you'd be eating that same exact food for the next few weeks.
Your embarrassment would have to survive through both the English AND Spanish versions of the "Happy Birthday" song.
And this was more than likely the cake sitting in front of you.
You knew exactly how your face would end up when you heard "¡QUE LE MUERDA! ¡QUE LE MUERDA!"
And your frosting-covered face then became the most photographed thing in the entire world.
If your family went all out, they would hire characters, which were either really great or highly questionable.
When it came to gifts, you would either get a lot of cash-filled handshakes...
...or see a few recycled gift bags.
A group of people (often drunk) would begin to sing together until the night's end.
If you invited any white friends over, the family dynamic was just too complicated to explain.
But at the end of the day, why explain? This is the family that made every single one of your birthdays that much more memorable.
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