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Atlas fucking Shrugged. My stepdad recommended it and I got about five chapters in before realizing it was essentially a million pages of nothing.
Also Fifty Shades of Grey. Of what I did manage to read, the writing was terrible and Christian just seemed incredibly creepy.
I once called my mom at 2am thinking she was my BF. I cried about our dead puppy then passed out. I only realized I had called her when I checked my call log at noon the next day...
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