When Robert Foster Scott revealed last week that he’s in the midst of a “health scare,” he speculated it was all because of a recent episode when, lost in Wisconsin, he had no choice but to eat six gallons of rancid mayonnaise spread on tree bark and wrapped in his homemade linen/rayon blend shorts.
“You may be thinking, ‘Bob Scott, this all sounds hard to swallow,’” he wrote on Instagram of the incident, “but I was fortunate enough to be able to wash it all down by drinking my own pee.”
If by now you’re asking, “Who is Bob Scott?” you’re far from alone. It’s a question even his most ardent social media follower might pose, because, you see, no one seems to know for sure.
That’s because he’s performance art. Since first appearing in August 2013, his Twitter account has amassed somewhere around a staggering 11,800 personal tweets, and his Instagram account 200+ posts, all contributing to elaborate world-building and characterization usually reserved for other mediums.
Here are nine times that have proved there is no one better at social media storytelling than him.
1. The Baghdad Bra Company
2. The battle of the church choirs
The entire story of Bob Scott’s battle of the church choirs has been collected here.
3. The haunted devil doll
4. His 3rd marriage
5. Kidnapped by a crazed super-fan
The whole harrowing story of Bob Scott’s abduction and rescue has been collected here.
6. Adventures in bum fighting
7. The sidewalk-dancing corporate mascot
Bob Scott’s foray as a sidewalk-dancing corporate mascot has been collected here.