Reasons I’m Glad I’m Circumcised

As told by naked mole rats. SFW…I think?

1. It doesn’t look like I’m wearing a turtleneck sweater down there.

2. Therefore making it easier to handle.

3. And as some would argue, more attractive.

boulderlocavor / Via

As attractive as things can get down there…

4. No one is ever shocked when they get in my pants.

Flickr/ Smithsonian’s National Zoo / Via Flickr: nationalzoo

Ya ya ok, I read that too. Bring on the small weenie jokes….

5. Giving me one less thing to stress out over when I’m trying to get it on with someone new.

Flickr/ Smithsonian’s National Zoo / Via Flickr: nationalzoo

6. Not having to make a painful decision.

Flickr/Mark Dumont / Via Flickr: wcdumonts

I’m thankful my parents made the decision for me when I was a babe, saving me the should I or shouldn’t I debate now that I’m older and cognizant of pain.

7. Not having to worry about dirt in unseen places.

@BBCNature/ / Via

8. Therefore being less prone to certain diseases.

Flickr/Smithsonian’s National Zoo / Via Flickr: nationalzoo

In this metaphor, the dirty soccer cleat represents disease.

9. Because the thought of having even more sensitivity down there is overwhelming.

Flickr/Joachim S. Müller / Via Flickr: joachim_s_mueller

10. For locker room solidarity.

Circumcision rates are decreasing, but we’re still in the majority.

11. And lastly because it really doesn’t matter either way.

We don’t live in biblical times anymore… and have access to daily showers and modern medicine. So as long as you take care of your junk, either way is cool.

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