Up until this point my tits have only been titillated by written descriptions of Borderlands 2. Not anymore. Thanks to an intrepid attendee of Gamescom, and their groin, we have some footage. It’s so delicious. We see some new environments, and the disposable-gun-as-grenade technique which is so flashy-bling-bling I can’t stand it. (That’s a good thing.)
Hit the jump for the video.
Elder Scrolls: Skyrim is going to do me a solid and allow me to consummate my male elf on male human dude-to-dude boner rubbing dreams. It’s about time too, all the pictures I’ve drawn imagining it are piling up and it’s time to actualize!
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DC’s revealed all the logos for the titles coming into existence in a couple of weeks as part of their ‘New 52’. Some of them are the same, some of them are pretty dope, and then ones like Captain Atom are impressively awful.
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Randy Martinez and Denise Vasquez are two artists combining for one sexy Star Wars art gallery in the City of Angeles. While it’s far too away for me to go see myself, the images themselves crank up the nostalgia bomb. It’s great knowing that no matter what Fat Daddy Lucas does unto his trilogy, the sentiment flew out of his hands and into the hearts of artists and creators a long, long time ago. So while he churns out feces now, people inspired by the Skywalker and his Crew can pay homage through art of their own.
Hit the jump for a look at their artwork, and gallery details.
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Initial orders and copies sold aren’t the same. Initial orders of enormous flagship titles aren’t indicative of how smaller titles of that publisher will sell, nor if the flagship will sustain the orders after the hype. Even with that in mind, I’m impressed at the initial orders for DC’s ‘New 52′ titles.
I’m a big honking fucking slut for Mass Effect, its entire franchise, and whatever sort of refuse BioWare will peddle out with its name stamped on it. Admittedly. Since Mass Effect 2 came out, I’ve bought all the DLC, happily wasting my hard earned Imperial credits on throwaway content that should have been a quest on the disc. A quest on the disc that I would have pounded through and sort of bemoaned it. Then Lair of the Shadow Broker dropped, and I was all, “Oh shit! A legit dope quest!” A quest so good that I deemed it better than a good 75% of the material that launched with the title. It set the bar. It set the bar high.
Sucker Punch: If a train wreck could have an abortion, and then that abortion was eaten, and vomited, and smeared onto celluloid.
The first look of Adrianne Palicki as Wonder Woman has been excreted onto the internet. Good lord. Out of context, yeah, yeah, yeah. The thing looks like something I saw a blob wearing at a convention that she bought from Spencer’s Gifts at Halloween.
Hit the jump.
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Despite its flaws, I like me some Dragon Age 2. It’s repetitive, there’s like four locations, and fetch quests rule the day. Wait, I think that may all fall under repetitive. Shit. Shitfuck. When even Dragon Age 2 apologists like myself have some serious complaints, a company must do something. Developer Chris Hoban has done just that, taking to Metacritic to review the game. With a 10/10.
…I’m not even sure if it is a television show though, is it? How do you classify this shit? Netflix has spent a cool $100 million to create and distribute David Fincher and Kevin Spacey’s House of Cards. David Fincher will be the executive producer, while Spacey is set to be the lead. The two’s project is based “on a British series and novel of the same name, the show will be a political thriller about a conservative politician with his eye on a high ranking office.” And while the original was set was in England, the Fincher/Spacey collaboration will be taking place in the good ole United States of America.
Hit the jump for more details.
Apparently at SXSW and other film festivals they have a bunch of “bumper” films. Minifilms that precede the screenings. Didn’t know that. Now I do. One of them showing at SXSW is “Mario” by Joe Nicolosi. Nicolosi works in a shitload of outstanding references in the framework of a trailer for an indie film version of Mario. Go ahead and watch it, you’re going to love it.
You dirty little slut.
Hit the jump for the video.
Goddamn, Kinect is fucking everywhere. I love how it’s been co-opted by countless people with unique ideas that have nothing to do with kicking an invisible volleyball. I change my mind, Kinect doesn’t suck. It’s actually fucking awesome. Latest example? It’s been used to cut down the cost of research into childhood mental disorders.
Behold the sexiness of….astronaut piss? The above image was taken by Jens Hackmann of Germany. Theoretically, it’s of the Discovery venting its excess water, but what exactly is in that water?
David Jaffe shoots from the hip, and that hip looks a lot like my heart. Last year, I was a bit confused as to why so many people were wanking off, splooging over, and generally orgasming on the face of the XBLA title Limbo. Frankly, I thought it was a piece of boring minimalist bullshit. Disagree? Well, good for you. Maybe you can still appreciate the hot fire that Jaffe is spitting regarding the media and their love for shitty artsy-fartsy games.
FEATURING: Breathalyzers, LEET HACKERS DOING CRAP, OLD HOT BRITISH BABES & MORE! Get in here, son!
Batman: Arkham City is officially dropping on October 18. What the fuck, Eidos! You had to release Arkham City right before the teeth of the gaming season. Son of a bitch. It would have been so much nicer to drop this dime in the middle of the summer. I could have kicked back, not worried about the deluge of games coming, and slowly manipulated my controller to the sight of Selina Kyle all done up in her latex and the such. Would have been astounding.
Hit the jump for some new images of this beast.
Yeah son, yeah! Did you check out the Super 8 trailer? Did it make you feel like you were staring at Ronald Reagan on television as President, and worshipping at the feet of Hulk Hogan before he was a bloated orange hot dog ready to burst?
Then hit the jump and check out the poster for it that has dropped.
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In Tim Burton’s 1989 Batman, Billy Dee Williams delivers a Harvey Dent that is strong, tough on crime, and grandiose. However, narrow-minded fanboys scoff at Williams’ performance because of the fact that he’s…um…well, a dude with a mustache.
I fucking warned all six of you regular readers here at OL. I’m going to be riding the jock of The Dark Knight Rises with a fevered nature that’s going to induce both moans of pleasure and screams at the horrible chaffing. While doing promotional work for Red Riding Hood or whatever, Gary Oldman’s begun to spit about TDKR. He’s mentioned that – gasp – it’s fucking dope, and hints at the villain.
It was rumored, and now it’s fucking confirmed. PlayStation 3 is getting online saves. That’s right, man! Sony is totally taking all of their bullshit to the fucking cloud!