31 Things That Are Too Damn Real For Anyone Raised By Italian-American Parents
Your immediate family could make up the population of a small country.
And if you didn't take seconds (or even thirds), there was something seriously wrong with you.
When other kids were sick, they were given cold medicine. When you were sick, you got a big bowl of al dente pastina.
There were constant disputes about whether this was called "sauce" or "gravy."
Family gatherings were confusing AF because there were at least five Tonys, eight Salvatores, and three Angelas in your immediate family.
There was always one friend who asked what your father did for a living because they thought he was in the Mafia.
Maybe that's because whenever you watched TV with your dad there were only two valid options: The Sopranos or The Godfather.
When you and your parents showed up at a restaurant, the volume increased exponentially.
Finally getting to touch Nonna's recipe book meant you weren't a total disgrace to the family.
...or better yet, the infamous panettone.
Christmas cookie baking was taken to the extreme because of how many family members you had.
In college, your friends made you cook the pasta, because they knew you'd complain if they did it wrong...
There was always a look of confusion on your parents' face when you told them you weren't hungry.
You would spend the summer gardening because your parents refused to go to the grocery store to buy tomatoes and basil.
Then, it would take you a whole weekend to jar all the tomatoes for future meals.
When your parents called your friend "stunada," that was the last time you ever invited them to your house. EVER.
A wooden spoon was, and still is, the scariest thing your Ma or Pop ever held.
Ma's definition of an "appetizer" was other people's definition of a main course.
Your dad was never happy with your choice of friends, unless they were Italian and somehow related to you.
There was always some super-extended family member that showed up to a gathering and you had no clue who they were, but they knew you.
Using various "hand signals" was the only way to effectively communicate at a family gathering.
And of course, you knew that family was the most important thing in the world and came before everything else — even food.
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