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    44 Thoughts You Have When You Go Threading

    I know I asked for this and she's just doing her job but I HATE HER SO MUCH.

    by , ,
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    1. Gotta sneeze, gotta sneeze, gotta sneeze.

    2 . Oh, fuck, ow, ow, ow

    3. I've done this about a thousand times.

    4. Why does it still hurt?

    5. Wait, which hand goes where?

    6. I should know this by now.

    7. Who’s a grown-ass woman? I’m a grown-ass woman.

    8. OW. Ow. Ow.

    9. Is she taking off my entire eyebrow?

    10. How would I even know?

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    11. ABEY! SLOW DOWN.

    12. I hate this woman.

    13. Screw you, parlour lady.

    14. Why is she doing this to me?

    15. OK, I know I asked her to.

    16. Should I be angry at her?

    17. Should I be angry at me?

    18. Should I be angry at the patriarchy?


    20. Ahhhh, yaaas. Nice and cold.

    21. I love you, scissors. You’re my favourite part.

    22. That wasn’t bad at all. I’m a boss.

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    *Starts threading the upperlip*


    24. Also, um, her boobs are on my forehead.

    25. They’re literally just there.

    26. MUMMAAAA.

    27. OW OW OW.

    28. FUCK FUCK. OW.

    29. Maybe if I inch slowly away from her, she'll leave me alone.

    30. Damn you, woman.

    31. Hey, her hands smell like biryani.

    32. No, rajma?

    33. I wonder what she had for lunch.

    34. Wait, what did I have for lunch?

    35. Did I have lunch?

    36. *whimpers*

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    37. Wait, it’s over? It’s really over?

    38. Yup, gorgeous, gorgeous, perfect, flawless, wow

    39. I'll just go home and tweeze whatever's left.

    40. Thank god I’m done.

    41. I mean, done for two weeks. Or like, one week. A week and a half. Depends.

    42. Man, I look. so good, I could be a model

    43. I should be a model

    *Notices red patches on upper lip and near eyebrows*

    44. Ok, in like 10 minutes.

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