The 17 Worst Things You Could Say To Someone From Chicago

"I'm from the suburbs but I tell everyone I'm from Chicago."

1. "This pizza is too thick."

RosieTulips / Creative Commons / Via Flickr: rosietulips

GET OUT OF MY LIFE.

2. "Why is it called the Windy City?"

instagram.com

Literally everyone will give you a different answer so stop asking.

3. "Let's go sit on the Willis Tower skydeck this weekend!"

rafael / Creative Commons / Via Flickr: rafaelm

The what now? Oh, you mean the SEARS Tower. And no.

4. "Oh, I'm from Hinsdale, but I tell everyone I'm from Chicago."

instagram.com

It's funny, you also say you're a human but you're actually a damn liar.

5. "Can you say 'Da Bears'?"

NBC / screen.yahoo.com

No, but I can say "Shut da fuck up."

6. "I'm so glad Macy's took over Marshall Field's."

chrismetcalfTV / Creative Commons / Via Flickr: laffy4k

I'm so glad we're no longer friends.

7. "Can I get some ketchup for this hot dog?"

Arnold Gatilao / Creative Commons / Via Flickr: arndog

Sure, but then you have to give the hot dog back because you DON'T DESERVE IT.

8. "Let's go to Navy Pier on Saturday night!"

amateur photography by michel / Creative Commons / Via Flickr: 119886413@N05

Sure, let's disregard the rest of the city to hang with a million tourists and a ~Ferris wheel.~

9. "Can I get a three hundred and twelve?"

Frank Gruber / Creative Commons / Via Flickr: somewhatfrank

No, but you can have a slap in the face.

10. Oh please, the weather can't be THAT bad."

Don Harder / Creative Commons / Via Flickr: dharder9475

It can and IT IS.

11. "I just wish there was a beach."

instagram.com

Yeah, beaches definitely don't exist here. Oh wait. Except they absolutely do.

12. "Let's go cruise LSD when you get off work."

Daniel Ladenhauf / Creative Commons / Via Flickr: ladi

Yeah, sitting in traffic sounds real fun.

13. "Pittsburgh was a better location for Gotham."

Warner Bros. Pictures / youtube.com

Lol k.

14. "I'm so excited for the Star Wars museum!"

instagram.com

Technically it's the Lucas Museum of Narrative Art and why are you excited about a hideous metal volcano?!

15. "Drink this Malört with me!"

Viewminder / Creative Commons / Via Flickr: light_seeker

No, please, I like having tastebuds.

16. "The Cubs won? Let's go party in Wrigleyville!"

John W. Iwanski / Creative Commons / Via Flickr: usachicago

Or we could NOT get trampled.

17. "Eh, Chicago's OK, but it's no New York."

Matt B / Creative Commons / Via Flickr: galverson2

Yeah, and we're fine with that.