back to top

Just 18 Fucking Funny Tweets About New Year's Resolutions

My New Year's resolution is to read this post.

Posted on

1.

New Years resolution: if you tell yourself you're gonna go to the gym and study you're only allowed to overeat or nap instead not both

2.

Telling people your New Years resolution so you'll "be accountable" is a great way to find out that no one cares about your resolution.

3.

new years resolution = don't be so hungover.

Advertisement

4.

resolution: get softer and prepare to die

5.

My New Years resolution is not to say, "ok 2018 will be my year" at the end of this year.

6.

Forgot to make resolutions? Just write out everything you did last night and at the beginning add the word "stop."

7.

My New Years resolution is for yall to mind your business more.

8.

My New Years resolution is to not cuss so fucking much

Advertisement

9.

My New Years resolution for 2016 was to not have a resolution so I wouldn't disappoint myself.... still disappointed myself

10.

My New Years resolution is to be more assertive if that's okay with you guys?

11.

My New Years resolution is to try and put less than 4 chapsticks through the washer & dryer next year.

12.

2017 Resolution: Don't let someone take up emotional real estate if they aren't paying rent.

13.

my only New Years resolution is to not spend money on food I honestly might be rich by 2017

Advertisement

14.

My 2017 resolution is to work on my low self esteem, but I don't think I can do it.

15.

New Years resolution: exercise (my right to eat) more (tacos)

16.

I've seen 6 people post that their new year's resolution is to "loose weight." I can think of a slightly more useful resolution for them

17.

New Years resolution: try to worry less, fill that time with oh god what am I supposed to fill that time with this is already going terribly

18.

Startup idea: a gym named Resolution that runs for the 1st month of the year, collects subscription fee, then converts to a bar named Regret

Every. Tasty. Video. EVER. The new Tasty app is here!

Dismiss