Chip Kelly spurned the University of Oregon today to become the new head coach of the Philadelphia Eagles (just a few days after he said he wasn't interested). Instead of wallowing in sorrow, Oregon has already posted a public job listing for a new head football coach, which all universities typically do when there is a vacancy, to comply with regulations.
To become the new head football coach at Oregon, you must have at least a bachelor's degree (though a preferred field of study isn't listed, so you art history majors are in the clear), and at least five years of "successful professional/collegiate coaching experience." If you've helped out on your nephew's pee-wee team, though, that could probably pass as an equivalent. People falsify information on job applications all the time. Chip Kelly had never been a head coach before he was given the top job at Oregon, and look how he turned out.
The listed responsibilities include promoting an "atmosphere of compliance," developing a football budget, and recruiting student-athletes, among other things. Winning is not listed as a reponsibility. Bottom line: If Ted Roof can keep finding jobs, so can you. To apply, send a letter of interest, your résumé, and three references to the Oregon athletic director.