1. "Oh, are you from Miami?"
The only two cities in Florida worth mentioning are Miami and Orlando.
2. “So, do you live on the beach?”
Yeah, and I spend the majority of my days surfing and digging sand castles.
3. “Publix subs are overrated.”
How dare you insult the Holy Church of Publix.
4. “Are there alligators in your backyard?”
At least 1 in 5 Floridians own a pet alligator. We're all basically like Steve Irwin.
5. "Florida's just full of old people, right?"
It's true, everyone here is 50+ years old.
6. “You’re lucky it’s so hot all the time.”
It's all fun and games until you burn your hands on the steering wheel after leaving your car outside all day.
7. “I’m jealous, the humidity probably doesn’t even bother you.”
OK, let me hear you say that once you've spent a minimum of 30 seconds outside in the summer.
8. “You must love that it’s always sunny.”
Just because it's called the Sunshine State doesn't mean it actually delivers the goods 365 days out of the year.
9. “Why are the people in Florida so weird?”
We're not all crazy, OK?
10. "Do you speak Spanish?"
I guarantee you that every single person in the state of Florida speaks it fluently.
11. "OK... but you have to speak Spanglish? Right?"
No hablo español.
12. “Stop complaining that it’s below 40 degrees, you’ve never experienced a real winter.”
For Floridians, anything below 40 requires at least five layers and immediate use of a parka.
13. “I bet you haven’t even seen any snow.”
Snow? What's that?
14. “What’s it like to be in a hurricane?”
IDK? Depending on the category, what's it like to get caught in the middle of a rainstorm?
15. “You must love all the oranges growing in your garden."
Interesting thought, but not everyone has an orange grove for a backyard.
16. “Is there anything else to do in Florida besides go to theme parks?”
Nope, there's nothing else to see here.
17. "Can I get tickets to Universal?"
I have an annual pass... maybe you should get one too?
18. “I bet you go to the Disney parks every weekend, it must be nice.”
Uhh... yeah... no thanks, definitely not fighting the tourist crowds.
19. "Wait, do you work at Disney World?”
No? You know I live in Ft. Lauderdale, right? Disney is in Orlando...
20. “Did you go to FSU?”
FSU isn't the only college in Florida... just saying...
21. "Lovebugs? They don't sound very irritating."
They're just as annoying as mosquitoes. Instead of attacking us, they go straight for our cars.
22. “My parents can't wait to retire in Boca Raton.”
Thanks for that update.
23. "The leaves don't change colors in the fall? How strange."
Sorry, but palm trees don't have time to change colors.