Why I Hate Moving With The Passion Of A Thousand Burning Suns

Moving is a part of life. It cannot be avoided. Whether moving out of your parents house or moving to a different town for a job, all of us will move from one domicile into another.

And I completely hate it.

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Between graduating college and getting married a year later, I moved four times. So I'm well acquainted with moving, and every stupid, stinking part of it.

Here's a countdown of my least favorite things about moving.

Finding boxes

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We spend most of our lives trying to get rid of boxes. Then, when we need them most, they're nowhere to be found. You beg your Facebook friends for free boxes, but none of theirs are the right size. You amass a collection from different grocery stores, but they all have some strange...oozings going on. But you power through. Because what else are you gonna do, buy boxes? I don't think so.

Spending hours reading packing hacks...that don't work.

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Almost everyone says they have the secret to making packing a breeze. And while there might be some tried-and-true packing tips out there, most of the lifehacks you find on Pinterest are a waste of time. Because let's be honest: putting your jewelry into egg cartons isn't going to make anything easier.

Begging your friends to help you move

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It's a lot of work to pack up everything from one house, load it onto a truck, unload it from that same truck, and put it into a different house. There are usually better ways to spend a Saturday. If anybody agrees to help, you better buy them pizza.

Needing to buy furniture and appliances because your new house doesn't have room

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Your new walls don't agree with the length of your beautiful sectional. The space between the kitchen sink and the wall is just a couple inches too short for your state-of-the-art refrigerator. In the distance, there are sirens.

Realizing how much garbage you have...that you refuse to throw out

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Nothing will make you feel like you belong on Hoarders like moving. You'll come across that box of old movie stubs you collected in high school, all the blank tapes you amassed when you were convinced that you were going to buy a tape deck and start making mix-tapes for your friends, all of the unpaired socks that you're keeping just in case.

And the worst part is you know that you're not going to throw it out now. Into "Miscellaneous #4" it goes.

Losing that same junk when you're unpacking

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Storytime: when I was three, I got a Raphael action figure, that I kept all my life. When my wife and I got married, I started hiding him (okay...and the rest of the Turtles, I have them all) in the Christmas tree.

But after we moved, I couldn't find him. Or my iPod, but that wasn't as important. I had had that Raphael for over twenty years, only to lose him in a move. I was livid.

Until months later, when I found him in the cockpit of the Millenium Falcon.

Saying goodbye to your old delivery places

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Finding restaurants that deliver to your house is a struggle. By the time you move out, you've already developed a deep relationship with our favorites. The delivery boys know you by name. And now, your new house is out of their delivery zone. You'll have to start over.

But once you're done, you just have to learn to love your new home.

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Settle in, put your feet up, and get comfortable in your new digs. Chances are, you'll be here a long time.

At least until you move again. Shudder.