Skip To Content

    15 Old Inventions That I Am Glad I Have Never Had To Use

    This is the opposite of steampunk, I think.

    1. Scrolls

    Nastco / Getty Images

    So cumbersome. How do you fit it in your bag? You need a lot of space to unfurl it, too. So glad we just have good ol’ laminated paper for our important paper needs now.

    2. Monocles

    Iggylee / Getty Images

    Why do you want just one eye to be able to see?

    3. The tiny little glasses that sit on the tip of your nose

    Studio-annika / Getty Images

    Nothing says “bourgeoisie” more than glasses that force you to look down on someone whilst sticking your nose up in the air.

    4. Gramophones

    Jakkapan21 / Getty Images

    Look, I get that vinyl provides a really good warm sound you can’t get with digital files or whatever, but I always imagine dropping a tangerine in a gramophone and never being able to get it out or use the damn thing again, and just having the smell of a slowly decomposing tangerine constantly lingering.

    5. Horse-drawn carriages

    Elisank79 / Getty Images

    I feel like the horses don’t enjoy it and I doubt they’re fairly compensated for their labour.

    6. Candles as a light source

    Chamillewhite / Getty Images

    Fire hazard and probably don’t even smell nice.

    7. Fish-oil lamps

    Evbuh / Getty Images

    Fire hazard and definitely don’t smell nice.

    8. Quills

    Marus-nazzarov / Getty Images

    Guaranteed way to get ink everywhere tbh.

    9. Typewriters

    Alfa Studio / Getty Images

    I can already feel the searing rage of a lot of literary nerds because of this inclusion, but frankly if having to restart a whole thing because you accidentally typed “helo” instead of “hello” is fine by you, then you have a lot more time than me and I will hear no more of this.

    10. Anvils

    Cronislaw / Getty Images

    These are probably still used now but much less often, which means they are far less likely to fall onto your head.

    11. Abacuses

    Yurii_zym / Getty Images

    I feel like this actually makes maths more complicated somehow.

    12. Mangles

    Piotr Wytrazek / Getty Images

    I do not want to mangle anything, let alone risk the possibility of being mangled myself.

    13. Butter churns

    Dragan Smiljkovic / Getty Images

    I just don't think butter is good enough to justify all that work.

    14. Sleeping caps

    Riskms / Getty Images

    How do they stay on your head while you’re sleeping?

    15. The big ol' diving suits

    Gameover2012 / Getty Images

    Perhaps I am getting the direction of causality wrong here, but I feel like as soon as anyone puts one of these one, the Loch Ness Monster immediately manifests in front of them.