21 Strange Things British People Will Never Get About LA
They have a tube system but no one seems to use it.
1. The fact that this weather is just a "normal day".
This is just what people in LA expect from their weather. Even in the middle of winter.
2. And the way people freak out about rain.
Whaaa, RAIN again! We're not in Los Angeles anymore Toto😫🙁 #SunStarvedInLosAngeles
Rain in LA gets the same reaction as a slight sprinkle of snow does in London.
3. Having to drive everywhere.
Basically everywhere in Los Angeles is a 30-minute drive away.
4. Seriously, walking is just not an option.
Two places might both be on Sunset Boulevard but they'll somehow still be an hour's walk away from each other.
5. And the freeways are terrifying.
There are so many of them and they're so fast.
6. The sales tax is only included once you take your item up to the till, so you're always surprised and disappointed by how much you're paying.
Hi America/Canada, Adding tax on at the till is fucking annoying. Sincerely, At the very least, Europe.
And of course, tax is always a different percentage for different items so you can never really pre-emptively calculate it.
7. Tipping is so complicated and expensive.
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The sheer amount of mental arithmetic you're required to do is astonishing because the general expected amount for a tip is 20%. Also, you're expected to tip even if all the server did was unenthusiastically sprinkle some chocolate on to your cappuccino without making eye contact.
8. There is a metro system, but no one takes it.
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It's not that bad, you guys!
9. The sheer amount of shops selling crystals.
People are very committed to balancing their chakras.
10. Strangers will just start conversations with you, and it's not weird.
11. The fact there is no real city centre and everything is spread out.
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All the separate areas are pretty insular and people are concentrated randomly, rather than many in one centre and fewer the further out you go, like in London.
12. You'll never get asked if you want a a single or a double shot in your drink, they just tip both the alcohol and the mixer in, in equal portions.
After three gin and tonics, when you would normally be pleasantly buzzed, you'll actually be vomiting in the toilet.
13. All the bathroom stalls always seem to have massive gaps and absolutely zero respect for your privacy.
14. Or there will only be one bathroom with one toilet for an entire café or restaurant.
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It'll be huge and beautiful, maybe even with a candle, but the queues will be massive.
15. Also, all the toilets with sensor flush are always way too eager and flush at the slightest suggestion of movement.
16. And many places still use paper towels instead of moving into the future of the skin-shifting Dyson airblade.
Dyson Airblade appreciation tweet 👏🏻👏🏻🇬🇧🇬🇧
Look, I have a lot of bathroom-related opinions.
17. The huge food portions.
18. The drinks are massive, too.
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A smoothie can be a meal in itself.
19. People are bizarrely obsessed with seltzer water.
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Just have soda or water, rather than a freak combination of both with none of the benefits of either.
20. Celebrity sightings are not unusual but no one gives a shit.
I had a brief interaction with Kristen Bell in line to use the loo at a café and none of my LA-native friends found this brush with fame as fascinating as I did.
21. And of course, that it's a city that actually looks like its postcards.
LA, you're beautiful and weird, never change.