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1. Some cushion supports so you can turn back time on your slouchy sofa, and continue spending happy evenings there for years to come.
2. A fabric shaver — no need to throw out a throw, pillow, chair, or any other piece of fabric just because it's started to pill! This easily pinches off those pesky little buggers to make your fabrics (including upholstery!) look brand new.
3. A can of Barkeeper's Friend powder cleanser to scrub off even the most impossible stains you never thought would come up, even with hardcore elbow grease.
4. And the Barkeeper's Friend Cooktop Cleanser that eliminates the built-up residue on shower doors *and* the burnt-on grime on glass cooktop stoves.
5. Or if you have no elbow grease to spare, three drill brushes because they'll transform essentially any grimy surface — from cooked-on grease on a stovetop to built-up dirt in a bathtub to the accumulated years of grime on tile and grout — without requiring any hard scrubbing on your part.
6. A mold and mildew remover made from a no-odor gel that sticks and stays to your grout and caulking so it can actually do its job: banishing the grossness from your bathroom.
7. A powerful no-rinse stain remover — it can conquer many of the seemingly-impossible messes you throw at it. Simply spritz it on, wait a second, then blot it up to see most stains truly vanish like magic.
8. And a leather stain remover spray because even though leather's usually relatively stain resistant, years with kids, pets, spouses, or just our own messy selves eventually take their toll, and this will basically give you a refund.
9. Speaking of leather, a leather recoloring balm so you can spend many more years reading in your favorite chair, reveling in the afternoon sun, *without* having to put up with furniture that looks like it's on its last legs.
10. A cute little brown sugar bear who just wants to soften up that impenetrable rock of brown sugar (and keep it perfectly soft and moist for ages), so you don't have to hack chunks off of it anytime you want to bake cookies.
11. An all-in-one wood cleanser and polish to transport water- or heat- or pet-damaged furniture (or cabinets, or wood floors) back to its former glory with just a coat or two.
12. Or if your damage is more minimal, a set of furniture repair markers and wax sticks because some damage will practically vanish after a few quick swipes of the right color.
13. A squeegee broom so you can extract years worth of built-up, embedded pet hair from your carpet and rugs (the kind that even your pet vacuum somehow doesn't touch) *and* easily sweep up the scattered bits from your hardwood or tile floors.
14. A mini white noise machine with non-looping audio to restore your bedroom to the place of peace it was when you first moved in. You'll finally get the solid night's sleep you deserve despite the fact that your new neighbors insist on loudly playing video games all through the night.
15. A dishwasher cleaning tablet — it works to disband the limescale and mineral buildup preventing your dishes from actually getting as clean as possible.
16. A bottle of makeup brush and sponge shampoo that will break up all the various layers of stubborn foundation, contour, concealer, powder, and eye makeup that's embedded itself in your tools. Even the ones you use most often will look fresh out of their packaging in no time!
17. A tube of patch and primer — it features a piece of sanding pad on the top of the cap and a putty knife on the other end, so you can repair that little hole your doorknob handle put in your wall that miiiight only be there because you enthusiastically throw the door open to greet your wiggling, overjoyed, nine-year-old pup everyday when you get home from work.
18. And a set of air-tight paint touch-up pens to easily cover up those small drywall repairs or pretty much any other scratches, scuffs, or stains that refuse to clean off any other way.
19. An oil stain remover that works wonders on basically any kind of stone (whether it's untreated *or* sealed and polished) because you shouldn't have to live with the consequences of that one leaky bottle of olive oil.
20. A waterproof, heat- and cold-resistant, flexible, moldable glue called Sugru so you can make dozens of tiny fixes, like saving those expensive cables and chargers so they can live to fight another day (or lots of other random little tasks, like fixing a plastic dino's boo boo).
21. A stainless steel cleaner and polish because all you have to do is spray it on then wipe it off to reveal a sparkling clean, fingerprint-free kitchen, zero real effort required.
22. A rust stain remover spray perfect for anything coated in a thin crust of orange — a few sprays and a final wipe of this stuff will actually make your shower, sink, and tub look exactly like they did the day they were first installed.
23. A handheld knife sharpener because it will fiercely hone each and every blade you own until they're back to their peak, like-new sharpness that makes it a thousand times easier to slice and dice.
24. A drain millipede covered with over 4000 micro-hooks to grab every last bit of the hair and gunk slowing down your sink and tub drains, so they actually flow freely again.
25. A pack of bubbling cleaning tablets because you simply plop one into any permanently-stained mug, coffee pot, slow cooker, or tumbler to fizz out stains, odors, and gunk with literally no elbow grease or scrubbing required.
26. A fume-free oven cleaner — it will erase the evidence of all those years of delicious baked goods, frozen pizzas, and bacon with one overnight treatment.
27. A foaming garbage disposal cleaner that you simply drop in, run a little water, then let its fizz reach down into the depths of your disposer for you, ridding it of any built-up slime and grossness.
28. A bottle of jetted tub cleaner because over the years those pipes get coated in soap, dead skin cells, and all kinds of other gunk that you definitely don't want keeping you company in your relaxing bath.
29. A pet hair removing–roller so you can pick up basically every last bit of shedding your furry friend's always leaving in their wake from any fabric surface with a quick, simple brush-brush-brush.
30. And a Pet House candle you'll burn every day because it really does eradicate any lingering odors around the house, whether they're from your beloved kitty or pup *or* from cooking yesterday's delicious dinner. Several of us here at BuzzFeed use them all the time and know they actually work!
31. A glass and ceramic cooktop cleaning kit that comes complete with a heavy-duty scrubber, a razor blade, and a bottle of powerful cleaner — basically everything you need to conquer even the messiest of burners so it shines like it was painstakingly restored by a renowned art historian.
32. A pumice stone because it beats back even the worst hard water buildup on toilets and tubs, so you can enjoy having a bathroom that actually looks clean again.
33. Some Goo Gone — it quickly and painlessly removes everything from tape residue to mysterious sticky substances, pretty much wherever you find them around your home.
34. A carpet shampooer that will scrub away then suck out years worth of mystery stains now, leaving your floors looking fresh, then come in handy over and over later, whenever you discover your spouse / toddler / teen / pet left you a surprise... like, several weeks ago. WHY.
35. A pair of scrub brushes — they have your back no matter how stuck-on or deeply-embedded the grime at hand happens to be, *especially* if you're in the mood to tackle your grout situation, or if your kids have a tendency to spray toothpaste all over the sink.
36. A specialty dryer vent cleaning kit and brush that (optionally) attaches to your drill, because lint can seriously build up in those vents and once you push the excess out, you'll reduce your fire risk and your clothes will dry faster (which means you'll save on energy bills).
Your home, reacting to you using even just one of these products:
The reviews in this post have been edited for length and clarity.