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10 Signs You've Been A Respiratory Therapist Too Long

Here are a few handy ways to know if it might be time to hang up the stethoscope.

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8. You check out your date's neck and wonder what their Mallampati score is.

Hey, before the movie starts, can you stick out your tongue and say, "Ahh"? What do you mean, "that's pretty creepy for a first date"?

6. You've seen more albuterol ordered "because it won't hurt" than for actual patient care.

Sleep apnea. Nausea. Sinus infection. Sore nipples. And let's not forget the closely-related "PALbuterol," ordered so nobody gets lonely.

5. You've started getting mail addressed to "Hey, Respiratory!"

At first it was upsetting, but now you just shrug your shoulders and think, "At least they're sending me something before there's an emergency."

4. Every time something beeps, you start looking for a ventilator to silence.

View this video on YouTube

Kind of like this, but the reverse.

2. You know more abbreviations than tweens texting each other.

You need an EKG and an ABG on the SOB w/COPD, CHF and CAD before we drop an ET and put them on APRV? OK. Wait, you want IPPB, too? GTFO.

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