An Airtight Case That Forrest Gump Is The Best Fictional Athlete Ever

You can't argue with facts and logic based on science.

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Because his life was about so much more than sports, Forrest Gump is rarely mentioned in the same sentence as other great fictional athletes — Rocky, Roy Hobbs, Teen Wolf. But he was the most accomplished of them all. Think about it.

Paramount Pictures

He's easily on par with the guys from Chariots of Fire as a sprinter. I mean, that motherfucker ran out of his leg braces. His ground speed was so fast that it straight up destroyed steel bars.

Paramount Pictures

How about outrunning an airstrike? Because Gump did that too, while carrying his best good friend, who weighs, like, way more than a football. You think Air Bud could handle this kind of napalm?

Logan Rhoades / BuzzFeed / Via Paramount Pictures

Not only was he the United States Table Tennis Player of the Year — an award you didn't even know existed until just now —

We're talking about unquestionably the best football player and table tennis champion in history — with clear talents in sprinting, MMA, swimming, hurdles, and ultramarathon endurance. Forrest Gump is Bo Jackson crossed with Usain Bolt crossed with AMERICA.