A Not-So Definitive Ranking Of The 30 Best Nicknames For Home Runs

“And that’s another whambleblam* for Miguel Cabrera!” *Not actually included because it’s not real.

Baseball has been played for like, I don’t know, 700 years or something. And somewhere in that timeline calling a home run a “home run” simply wasn’t exciting anymore, so the players, coaches, fans, and commentators started to use nicknames instead. And now home run nicknames are as common in baseball as horse steroids. But what’s the point of having a bunch of nicknames if you don’t rank them? Exactly, there isn’t one. That’s what I’m saying.

Note: These are NOT home run calls, like “You can put it on the boooooard, YES!” Those are something completely different and they have no place on this list.

30) Poke
29) Long Ball
28) Homer
27) Knock
26) Smack
25) Jack
24) Shot
23) High-Riser
22) Dinger
21) Blast
20) Bomb
19) Rocket
18) Missile
17) Laser
16) Roof Shot
15) Moon Shot
14) Tape Measure Shot
13) Goner
12) Big Fly
11) Upper-Decker
10) Tater
9) No-Doubter
8) Four-Bagger
7) Round-Tripper
6) Out-of-Towner
5) Gopher Ball
4) Souvenir
3) Yahtzee
2) Grand Salami (for a grand slam, obviously)

And the winner, in an upset:

1) Oppo Taco (a home run to the opposite side of the park, used specifically by the Angels)

Think we missed one or want to plead the case for your favorite home run nickname? Let us know in the comments.

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