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    Posted on May 24, 2017

    17 Times Parents Did Not Hold Back On Twitter

    Kids puke on you ALL. THE. TIME.

    1. This shitty situation:

    If you're having a bad day know that I just got shit on by Hayden..... #parentlife

    Twitter: @jenaleigh11

    2. Also, this one:

    The number of times per day that I sniff another human's butt is kinda ridiculous. #momlife #didyoupoop

    Twitter: @ChelseaArnold5

    3. This dangerous confession:

    Eating pop tarts and drinking chocolate milk in bed during the kid's morning nap 😏 #momlife

    Twitter: @missdawl

    4. This reality check:

    If you haven't used a juice box as a chaser, then you probably haven't reached your lowest point in parenting yet.

    Twitter: @workingmom86

    5. This rad bonus:

    Babies are miracles. They discover new things each day. For example, today my son discovered that he can snap my bra while he nurses. 😑

    Twitter: @ChelseaArnold5

    6. This truth:

    The fun part of having a toddler in your 40s is that when you're laughing and jumping around at the park together you both pee your pants.

    Twitter: @_SingleBabyMama

    7. OMG:

    When Addie was 3 I took her into men's room as I was using urinal she ran over & started splashing around in other urinal. #parentingfail

    Twitter: @mattharris1079

    8. Yes:

    5-year-old: I wish we all had infinity dollars Me: That’d wreck the economy 5: I just- Me: Go to your room until you understand inflation

    Twitter: @xplodingunicorn

    9. This important realization:

    [somebody drops mic, walks off] [parent picks up mic, puts it away] - The Cycle of Life

    Twitter: @mommywhiner

    10. This excellent lesson:

    I watched Sleeping Beauty with my son and then I had to explain to him the importance of consent.

    Twitter: @workingmom86

    11. This:

    Summer vacation. These two words make me cringe. Why do our children need a vacation? None of my kids have a job,... https://t.co/A7BMjwecKw

    Twitter: @thatsinapropro

    12. This warning:

    Silence is never golden. It just means my toddler is playing with the toilet plunger.

    Twitter: @babyrabies

    13. This apocalyptic reality:

    Losing power pre-kids: this is mildly inconvenient, let's bang With kids: this is the end of days. Come, we must forsake this place #momlife

    Twitter: @MeredithIreland

    14. This never-ending cycle:

    My kid has some pretty strong opinions for someone who gets stuck in their own shirts

    Twitter: @Dadpression

    15. This feeling:

    You know you are sleep deprived when you throw your socks into the toilet instead of the clothes hamper. #momlife #neverwearingthoseagain

    Twitter: @heatheradv

    16. This relatable realization:

    It's like that old saying, "You can lead a horse to water but you can't make a toddler eat his waffle cuz you put it on the blue plate, EW."

    Twitter: @ixix82

    17. This inevitable fact:

    I have approximately 28 minutes before my children come home and destroy everything I have accomplished today. #Momlife #mom

    Twitter: @snugasbug

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