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A Weed Company Just Bought An Entire California Town And I'm Moving There

Nipton, California, is about to become a pot paradise.

Guys. Guys. Real talk. A rich AF cannabis corporation is about to create what is basically a winery for doobage.

"Ooooh, this smokes so smooth, and what a lovely citrus flavor with faint blackberry undertones." - Your mom, pretty soon. (No, YOU know too much about weed.)

American Green bills itself as a tech company in the medical marijuana industry. Nipton, California, is a Gold Rush town in San Bernardino County, near the Nevada border, with a population of around 20 people.

American Green

Pretty, soon Big Green (are we calling it that yet? Can we make that a thing?) will transform the area into "an energy-independent, cannabis-friendly hospitality destination".

Columbia Pictures

So they're going to produce greens while being green, huh? ::nudge nudge::

Well, count me the fuck in. But what is a cannabis-friendly hospitality destination? Will there be canna-oil massages? Farm-to-bowl buds? Hemp everything? WEED SOMMELIERS??

Comedy Central

And if there are, how do you apply for that job? So far, actual plans include expansion of the town's existing farm and the sale of cannabis-infused water.

“We are excited to lead the charge for a true Green Rush," American Green's CEO David Gwyther said in a statement. "The cannabis revolution has the power to completely revitalize communities in the same way gold did during the 19th century.”

Universal Pictures

That sounds rad, David. But the most important question remains. The name Weed, CA, is already taken, so what will this stoner nirvana be called?

I guess we'll have to wait and see. But that doesn't mean we can't make suggestions!

  1. What should pot town be called?!

    What should pot town be called?!

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