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    Posted on Sep 1, 2015

    17 Times Your Professor Had No Chill

    Sometimes they just need to be told to sit down.

    1. When you still have a month left of summer and they insist on sending you e-mails.

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    2. When they want you to reenact the middle ages.

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    You mean I have to print it on real paper then walk to your office to turn it? You know about the internet right?

    3. When they call on you and you didn't raise your hand.

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    I know you know that I don't know the answer!

    4. When they tell you footnotes aren't a part of your page count.

    I think you misspoke, sir.

    5. When they are sly little fuckers.

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    6. When they are confused as to why no one shows up to their office hours.

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    7. When they try to take away your most useful source.

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    I think it's cute that you think I'm not going to use it anyway.

    8. When the utter these four words:

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    Bye Felicia.

    9. When they don't believe in excused absences.

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    Hangovers and "I just don't feel like it" are totally legitimate excuses.

    10. When they think time is a fluid concept.

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    I skipped getting a breakfast sandwich to be here on time, OK? Have some respect.

    11. When their minimal power turns into a dictatorship.

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    "So if it has a screen, beeps, or is otherwise more entertaining than my lecture it better not be turned on."

    12. When they misinterpret spring break as a study break.

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    I'll study for this math test by counting all the margaritas I'll be drinking at the swim-up bar.

    13. When they spout low-stakes lies.

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    Not that you'd actually do it early, you just want them to respect the idea of you being organized.

    14. When they butt into your weekends.

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    Weekends are reserved for no pants and movies in bed. Why is that so hard to understand?

    15. When finals roll around and this is their idea of a study guide/review session:

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    Cool. Not like I have any other classes to prepare for.

    16. When you actually did the assignment and they don't even care.

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    You're joking, right?

    17. When they get reeeaaal nice before handing out student-teacher evaluation forms.

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    Bullshit, Madame! You've hated me since the day I failed that irregular verb quiz.

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