1. Senator Wendy Davis is a badass.
So there’s this bill in the Senate right now that will essentially cut off legal access to abortion in the state of Texas. Governor Rick Perry has already said that if he can get his hands on it, he’s going to sign the bill into law. Senator Wendy Davis said, “LOL, over my dead body.”
So she’s filibustering it. Which means she has to talk until midnight tonight. Without stopping. She cannot sit down, she cannot have a glass of water, she cannot go to the bathroom. She cannot lean on anything. And she has to stay on topic—whatever The West Wing told you, she can’t start reading from the phone book or making up funny nicknames for people based on personal character flaws or insecurities. Which is a shame, but thems politics for you.
Sen. Davis already has one strike against her for talking about Planned Parenthood—opponents charged that she had gone off topic, and the President upheld the complaint. Currently they’re trying to get her kicked off the floor like a bunch of assholes because someone may have helped her put a back brace on.
So don’t worry, guys. We can rest assured that the opponents have a deep and abiding care for women’s health. Just so long as by “women’s health” we mean “literally everything but.”
YouTube comments: surprisingly on point.
5. When the floor president recommended she not sit while they deliberate, Sen. Davis said, “I’m fine. I’m prepared to stand.”
She then added, “I’ve got bigger balls than the rest of you neckbeards combined.”*
(*She did not say this.)
6. Watch the livestream. I’m serious.
The second-best part of this livestream is watching all the other badasses helping Sen. Davis out by asking stupid questions to fill the time and reading long passages from the rulebook.
We can’t all stand up for thirteen hours wearing pink Nike sneakers like a total boss, but we can help her by saying stuff like this:
Senator Davis has not leaned on her desk. She has not leaned on her desk. And you know it, because you are watching her every move. And you might note, Mr. President, that the note says that he may not lean on his desk. Senator Davis is a woman. I might argue that this rule does not apply to Senator Davis.
—Senator Judith Zaffrini, showing some A-1 attitude.
TL;DR: the point is, cool stuff is happening in Texas politics, regardless of how it turns out. Sometimes we all forget that politicians are meant to look out for us. They’re supposed to be there, as Senator John Whitmire literally just said (seriously why are you not watching yet, this guy is gold), “to assist each other in being effective representatives of our districts. … We are not the House of Representatives.”
What we’ve learned here is that Texans can be kind and that nobody wants to be the House of Representatives.