1. A foot taps…
2. …a teacher stares…
3. …a bell rings.
4. Bros in bucket hats begin dancing.
5. SHIT. SHIT. SHIT.
6. OH FUCK. OH FUCK. OH FUCK.
7. Bitch, please. It’s the one and only, the future queen, the talented and sweet Britney Jean Spears. Your savior could never.
8. With her gaggle of gays, She begins.
9. Her eyes penetrate your soul.
10. She feels your flaws. She has been put on this planet to purge our sins.
11. She speaks in tongues.
13. Everyone does as she does.
14. It was all brought together by a little bald British man named Nigel. Nigel Dick. Let us not forget that the original video concept was thought of by Her, though.
15. She does a back handstand.
16. She side-punches the air.
17. She screams at us from the backseat of a convertible.
18. She’s still screaming, this time in a courtyard.
19. “THE WORLD IS SUCH A HORRIBLE PLACE!!!”
20. “I AM HERE FOR YOU. FOLLOW ME OR BURN IN HELL!!!!!”
21. She dances the pain away.
22. “Ha ha ha, sinner!”
23. There is literally a football zooming by her head.
24. A virgin sacrifice appears.
25. She coos.
26. A dance number breaks loose.
27. She slams her body on the ground.
28. It’s happening.
29. Light beams down.
30. The Rapture is here.
31. Chaos ensues.
32. She hugs a basketball.
33. Pure terror.
34. People are sliding all over the fucking place.
35. WHAT IS THIS, A DANCE FLOOR?!
36. WHAT IS THIS, A TEACHER DANCING?!
37. THEY CAN’T EVEN SCORE.
38. She awakes.
39. A savior is born. She has risen.
- Sixteen people died after a hot air balloon caught fire and crashed in Texas Saturday.