1. Laura Dern
2. Walking past people on the street
3. Walking fast in general
4. Talking about going to the gym
5. Talking about not going to the gym
6. Iced coffee
6½. Talking about how you only drink iced coffee regardless of the weather
Iced coffee is a full gay meal
7. The underwear aisle in a store
8. Ariana Grande's ponytail
9. Vodka sodas
10. Tank tops
11. Wearing a tank top when you shouldn’t be wearing a tank top because it's weather inappropriate
12. That one hot pink Nike sweatshirt
13. Salt lamps
14. Getting drunk at brunch and then taking a nap from 3–6 p.m.
15. Dehydration
16. Being tired
"Can I get a gay water?" "What's that" "a vodka soda, duh"
17. Happy hour
18. Most dogs
19. Wearing straight brim hats backwards
20. Talking about not having abs
21. Animal Crossing
20. Twitter
21. The God Warrior
22. Most memes
23. Wendy Williams
24. Kelly Clarkson covering songs on her talk show
25. Zara short-sleeve printed button-downs
26. Adding avocado to a meal
27. Naming your dog “Finn”
28. Miss Juicy
29. Buying Cameos of D-list celebrities for your friends on their birthdays
30. Sitting like this:
why do all gay people sit like this
31. Meeting someone five times and still not remembering their name
32 Charli XCX
33. Close friends circles on Instagram
34. Talking about drinking water
35. Never actually drinking water
36. Most lettuces
37. Kale, especially
38. Sweetgreen
39. Football (the outfits and the Super Bowl half time show)
40. Liking 10 pictures on someone’s Instagram and then not following them
41. Dolphins
42. Seltzer
43. Basically every remix of a song
44. Fiddle leaf and Monstera plants
45. Also snake plants
46. The name "Joanne"
47. Ina Garten
48. Mr. Clean
49. Bandanas
50. Charcuterie boards
51. The name “Blake”
52. Wrestling
53. Sourdough bread
54. "Beanie season"
55. Smoothies
56. Hummus
57. Quinoa
58. Cauliflower rice, spaghetti squash, and zucchini noodles
59. Middle-aged women who love wine
60. Pinot grigio and rosé
61. Palm Springs
62. Half of Chicago
63. D.C.
64. Most of New York and LA
65. Europe (most countries)
I wish I could be one of those gays in Mykonos that everyone makes fun of
66. Getting into crystals and essential oils
67. Anxiety
68. Depression
69. Blaming everything on anxiety and depression
70. Matcha
71. The word “dad”
72. The word “mom”
73. Standing like this:
why do all gay people stand like this
74. Astrology
75. Pretending to know and care about astrology
76. Blaming things on Mercury being in retrograde
77. Not actually having any idea what Mercury in retrograde is
78. Being shocked when someone doesn’t know their rising sign
astrology is the gay christianity
79. Basically every Christmas song except "Christmas Shoes"
80. Blocking family members on social media
81. The movie Rat Race
82. VH1 dating reality shows from 2007
83. Halloween
84. The nuns from Sister Act
85. "Yeehaw"
86. Ring lights
87. Knowing what OnlyFans is
88. Knowing who Stacie Orrico is
89. Most Pokémon
90. Greek mythology
91. That one Kris Jenner tweet about being stuffed with a meatloaf
92. Being late
93. Burning down gyms
94. The month of June
95. Talking about CrossFit
96. The Christian Girl Autumn girl
97. Knowing anything Lindsay Lohan has done post 2010
98. That hot animated dad from that Pixar movie
99. And last, but not least, Bugles
