1. Kentucky had the absolute worst seat at the convention.
2. Victoria Jackson is a Mac person. She also makes this face while working.
3. Delegate dancing needs to be a sport or something.
4. Always be aware of your surroundings while cheering at a political convention.
5. Kansas is really into and really proud of 'The Wizard Of Oz'.
6. You can't just attach a Beanie Baby to a hat and call it a day.
7. You also shouldn't tape flowers to a pole.
8. Jon Voight is the loudest, most vocal Republican celebrity.
9. These exist:
10. This also exists:
11. Texas Republicans like really gay music.
12. The swag bag at the convention sucks.
13. Straws shouldn't be made out of cardboard.
14. The Raging Grannies choreograph their own routines. They strategically situate the vaginas.
15. Scientologists are courting Occupy Wall Street people.
16. The Tea Party isn't really a thing anymore.
17. Geraldo is a MASTER picture poser.
18. Watch out for forklifts.
19. They keep extra state sign posts in the back.
20. It sucks to get kicked out of a Pat Boone over 60 party.
21. If you go to the RNC, you might just get to touch an Olympic medal.
22. Working/typing/thinking on a walking treadmill is pretty hard.
I burned 32 calories in 10 minutes.
23. Callista's hair is absolutely flawless in real life.
24. An old lady wearing an elephant hat is always funny.
25. Republican moms love bling.
26. You're not really allowed to bring signs into the convention center, so all of the signs you see on TV are pre-made.
27. Republicans need more swag that lights up.
28. Republicans aren't into face masks.
29. The Texas delegates are really good at coordinating their wardrobes.
30. This is what happens to the balloons after they drop.
31. This PRO-LIFE pin was the most popular pin.
32. This was the most popular anti-Obama pin.
33. But there wasn't really that much anti-Obama swag to begin with. My favorite anti-Obama swag was a " Pootin' Tootin' President Obama" doll.
34. I only saw one person wearing something for "traditional" marriage, and it was this pin.
35. This was the weirdest pin at the convention.
36. The Montana GOP has the best logo.
37. Everyone needs to get off of their cellphones.
38. Flags look like butts.
39. There were a bunch of anti-Republican billboards set up.
40. "Mint Romney" is a brilliant name for mint lotion.
41. The Huffington Post had the most elaborate free house.
42. There really are gay Republicans.
43. It's perfectly okay to wear something you wore earlier in the convention.
44. The most expensive food at the convention was chicken fingers.
45. People shouldn't be eating greasy convention food and staying in an enclosed space for 6 hours.
46. The most expensive item in the Romney gift store is the Romney iPhone case. It costs $40!!!!
47. The Prayer Room is always poppin.
48. The best way to get your picture with Mitt Romney and Paul Ryan is to stand in the middle of this portrait.
49. The best way to dress up a suit is with a Reagan visor with a transparent red brim.
50. The Secret Service isn't so secret.
51. New York has the most boring delegacy.
52. There is a company that makes fancy Republican elephant dresses.
53. Craig Romney is the hottest Romney son.
54. You can make a hat out of a campaign sign.
55. Not everyone was so into Clint Eastwood's speech.
56. SCOTT HAMILTON IS A REPUBLICAN
57. It's kind of terrifying after the ballons fall.
58. And last but not least, Stephen Baldwin needs a new stylist.
All photos taken by Matt Stopera... except 22, 50, and 52 which were taken by Scott.
Deputy Editorial Director, Devout Member of the Church of Godney
Contact Matt Stopera at firstname.lastname@example.org.
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