Before you go any further, you need to read what Ryan told the Herald Sun:
"Anyone can get those (pecs) if they work at it. It's just a lot of exercising. And it's really quite pointless, because you go to a gym and you lift a heavy thing so a muscle grows, but the only thing the muscle can actually do is to lift that heavy thing", he joked.
"After a while they're like pets because they don't do anything useful. But you have to feed them and take care of them otherwise they'll go away. I feel a bit goofy having them, to tell you the truth."
Once upon a time, long long ago, like in 2002, when Ryan wasn't so proud of his pets.
It was a dark time. He dated Sandra Bullock then.
Very dark. Very very dark.
But then it happened. He broke up with Sandra (thank you, God) and focused on more important things: his pets.
In 2004, they were liberated.
And life as they know it was forever changed.
But he still wasn't all that happy. Ryan knew he could do better for his pets.
So he gave them coffee.
And with a little fresh air...
Some sun light...
And a confidence boost from Michelle Williams...
The pets were bigger, happier, and in peak condition!
Once again, they were free to do as they please!
And the world was a better place.
And we all lived happily ever after.
Note: I am just ignoring the 'Lars And The Real Girl' weight gain phase because that never happened to me. Okay, bye!