TAKE ONE DRINK:
Any time Scott Hamilton does one of the following:
Any use of the word “fire” or fire metaphors when describing a skater’s performance.
E.g., "Hot off her win at nationals" or "That was a fiery performance."
Any talk of Michelle Kwan and “the gold that eluded her.”
Any use of “this young lady.”
E.g., "This young lady was second at this years' world championships." "This young lady could surprise some folks." "This young lady loves to listen to Lady Gaga before competing." Etc.
Any time someone falls.
Any time there is 1 minute of total silence without commentary and you have no idea what's going on.
TAKE A SHOT:
Any use of the word “musicality.”
Any comparison to a horse is made.
E.g., "She's like the Seabiscuit of figure skating."
If Scott Hamilton “knows her.”
Any use of the phrase “supple knees.”
Any mention of an American figure skating legend.
E.g., Peggy Flemming, Tonya Harding, Kristi Yamaguchi, Dorothy Hamil, or Nancy Kerrigan.