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39 Songs That Shouldn't Have Flopped But Straight People Let It Happen

This isn't necessarily an attack on straight people, this is an all-out war on heterosexuality!!! How could you let this happen to these bops?!

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1. "Sparks" by Hilary Duff

It's straight-up homophobic that this gorgeous song wasn't a No. 1 hit.

2. "React" by the Pussycat Dolls

The gayest comeback of all time, ignored by straight people everywhere.

3. Ashley O's entire discography (two songs)


The most powerful two-song discography ever.

4. "Cool for the Summer" by Demi Lovato

Apparently, straight people never got the memo that "Cool for the Summer" has been the song of the summer for the past five years.

5. Tinashe's entire music career

It's a literal gay nightmare that Tinashe STILL hasn't *happened* already.

6. Britney Spears' Glory album

RCA Records

In 2016, Britney Spears released her best album in a decade. It's sad that heterosexuals have no idea it even exists.

7. Little Mix (in the US)

It's anti-gay that Little Mix has been unable to break into the US market. Trump's America, indeed.

8. "Sledgehammer" by Fifth Harmony

Heterosexuals were just not ready for this bop!

9. "4th of July" by Kelis

Flesh Tone made me gayer, and straight people could use a little less heterosexuality.

10. "I Luh Ya Papi" by Jennifer Lopez

Gays know this is simply a J.Lo classic.

11. Anything JoJo released after age 13

A talented vocalist with good songs, if only the general public could see that. 😭

12. "Livin' It Up" by Ciara

This wasn't even a single, but it deserved to be. I blame the patriarchy, I guess.

13. "Heartstrings" by Leighton Meester

A triumph and masterpiece.

14. Bonnie McKee

Bonnie deserves better.

15. Kim Petras' Turn Off the Light


A pop dance album with a Halloween theme?! An idea so powerful that straights can’t even process it.

16. "Here's to Never Growing Up" by Avril Lavigne

From Avril's criminally + problematically underrated last album. Imagine being a heterosexual and not knowing Avril has been releasing music for the past 10 years. That's sad, huh?

17. "G.U.Y." by Lady Gaga

Like most gay things, "G.U.Y." was ahead of its time.

18. "Lemonade" by Danity Kane

I would blame straight people on this flopping, but honestly these girls just really hated each other.

19. "Don't Hold Your Breath" by Nicole Scherzinger

Her best song since every Pussycat Dolls song.

20. "Everything Is Embarrassing" by Sky Ferreira

Sky Ferreira: A name only gays and Williamsburg hipsters know.

21. "Get Outta My Way" by Kylie Minogue

It's 2020 and straight people still have relegated Kylie to Madonna's shadow and I am NOT okay with that.

22. "How to Be a Heartbreaker" by Marina & The Diamonds

Unfortunately, and I say this with love, Marina will always be for the gays (and lovers of gay-ish, gay-related, or highly homo things).

23. "Closer" by Tegan and Sara

Yes, the rumors are true: America is afraid of two powerful queer women who make bops.

24. "Into You" by Ariana Grande

No, this song didn't remotely flop...but it should have been No. 1 for 74 weeks. I hate that I live in a world where "Dangerous Woman" was a bigger hit than this.

25. The Bionic album


Bionic turned out to be ahead of its time. An underrated pop masterpiece.

26. "Ugly Heart" by G.R.L.

G.R.L. could have been *that* girl group, but breeders decided otherwise.

27. "Dancing on My Own" by Robyn

This song has a cult-like straight following, but that's not enough. Every straight person from Maine to Minnesota (and beyond) should know this song!

28. "A No No" by Mariah Carey

This song is classic Mariah and deserved to be her 19th No. 1.

29. "Never Really Over" or "Harley's in Hawaii" by Katy Perry

Katy Perry released her best songs since "Teenage Dream," but no one cared.

30. Most songs by Zara Larsson, but especially "All the Time"

It's sad that 99% of the human population doesn't know about "All the Time." Thank God homosexuality exists and that 1% do.

31. Anything Tove Lo released after "Habits"

From "Glad He's Gone" to "Disco Tits" to "I'm Coming." Tove has the range.

32. The pop songs from A Star Is Born

Warner Bros.

Ally could do Led Zeppelin’s "Kashmir," but Led Zeppelin could never do "Why Did You Do That?"

33. "Vroom Vroom" by Charli XCX

It's a song about sex literally using CAR metaphors. It was basically straight bait!

34. "Commander" by Kelly Rowland

Kelly Rowland has made some of the best dance music of our time! It's sad that straight people only know her from Destiny's Child.

35. "Green Light" by Lorde

“Green Light” and the entire Melodrama album spoke to gays in a way that straights just will never understand. It’s been three years and the gays are still screaming about it.

36. "Motivation" by Normani

I'm sorry, but I blame straight people for there being no second Normani single yet.

37. Betty Who

Because if there's a Pride parade, Betty Who will surely be performing there.

38. "Feedback" by Janet Jackson

A Janet Jackson classic that heterosexuality has ignored for far too long.

39. And Carly Rae Jepsen

Enough said.

You can listen to the playlist on Apple Music or on Spotify here:

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Ryan Pattie/BuzzFeed