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Kale Comes Out As Gay In Exclusive BuzzFeed Interview

Kale responds to rumors that it is, in fact, gay. BuzzFeed reports.

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Backstory: Madonna was asked to write down the first word that came to mind in a game of word association at BuzzFeed. After writing down "gay" for Vladimir Putin, Madonna proceeded to write down "gay" for the leafy green vegetable, kale.

Proof:

Then, the internet reacted accordingly...by losing its f*#%ing mind.

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The outrage.

Now, in an exclusive interview, we got Kale to stop by the BuzzFeed offices to speak up.

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Macey J. Foronda/BuzzFeed

With its signature dark sunglasses and leafy fronds, Kale can at first appear aloof, but I'll let you know, Kale is actually very down-to-earth and grounded.

Macey J. Foronda/BuzzFeed

After a quick handshake and some small talk about what Chard is up to, the interview began.

Macey J. Foronda/BuzzFeed

Right away, Kale wanted to clear the air.

Macey J. Foronda/BuzzFeed
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"Yep, I'm gay."

Macey J. Foronda/ BuzzFeed

In my six years as a professional vegetable journalist, I have never been so completely at a loss for words in an interview. The room fell completely silent.

Macey J. Foronda/BuzzFeed

Call me unprofessional, but I was moved to give Kale a hug in that moment.

Macey J. Foronda/BuzzFeed

After Kale came out, we decided to lighten the mood by doing our own game of word association like Madonna had done before. More surprising revelations followed.

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ORGANIC FARMING:

Macey J. Foronda/BuzzFeed

GREENHOUSES:

Macey J. Foronda/BuzzFeed

SPINACH:

Macey J. Foronda/BuzzFeed

PHOTOSYNTHESIS:

Macey J. Foronda/BuzzFeed
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CUCUMBERS:

Macey J. Foronda/BuzzFeed

SHALLOTS:

Macey J. Foronda/BuzzFeed

GUACAMOLE:

Macey J. Foronda/BuzzFeed

BLUETOOTH:

Macey J. Foronda/BuzzFeed
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BOWLING:

Macey J. Foronda/BuzzFeed

MADONNA:

Macey J. Foronda/BuzzFeed

Now, Kale's brave statement is a cover story that the entire world can embrace.

John Gara for BuzzFeed
John Gara for BuzzFeed
John Gara for BuzzFeed

Thank you, Kale! Hopefully this will be an inspiration to all young leafy greens everywhere!