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Well, I Found The Most Humongous Thighs Competing At The Beijing Olympics, And They Belong To Speed Skater Joey Mantia

They could kill a man.

Joey Mantia is a long track speed skater.

Joey sticking his tongue out at a competition

He'll be competing in his third Olympic games, representing the US in Beijing.

Joey sitting on the floor against a wall with headphones on at a competition

And let's cut to the chase: He has enormous thighs.

Like...

My...

God...

Whew.

They could open a geode.

They could annihilate a watermelon.

They could crush a skull.

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Joey's thighs are somewhat notorious.

He's been posting pictures of them for years.

And who could blame him?

The vascularity of it all!

I'm...

Joey is humble, too! He even revealed his thirst trapping ways.

So, yeah, just wanted to shed some light on what speed skaters' legs look like.

And I know who I'll be rooting for in Beijing!

Keep it up, Joey.

As the ancient seventh grade yearbook proverb goes: "You rock, never change."