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Celebrity

Adam Levine Is The Definition Of "Hot Douche"

A study.

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Hot douche (n): A man or woman that is attractive and a bit of a d-bag. See also: Adam Levine.

According to market research (Twitter), scientific formulas (think Pythagorean theorem), and the dictionary (see above), this is Adam Levine.

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There is photographic evidence, quotes (SERIOUSLY READ THEM), and yes, more science, that back up this claim.

Getty Images/ Ethan Miller

First off, the tattoos.

Getty Images/ Christopher Polk/Staff

Those jeans.

And this photo.

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In an interview with Details magazine, this is what Adam Levine said about yoga. READ THIS.

"You know what yoga's good for?" Adam Levine asks, pausing in mid-thought as he discusses his healthful lifestyle. He draws to his feet, balances in the private jet's narrow aisle, points at his crotch, and thrusts his pelvis like a porn star. "I'll tell you what yoga is good for: Fuuuu-k-ing," he chimes, in a singsong falsetto, then laughs.

And he also said something about Michelle Kwan?

"I love attention. I can't stand not having it. It just has to be the right kind. To do what you love, to be with the people you love? That's all I want. That's the 'kwan.'"

HUH?

Michael Buckner / Getty Images

I digress.

Getty Images/ Christopher Polk/Staff
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This is what Adam said about loving women:

"There's two kinds of men," Levine posits. "There are men who are f-cking misogynist pigs, and then there are men who just really love women, who think they're the most amazing people in the world. And that's me. Maybe the reason I was promiscuous, and wanted to sleep with a lot of them, is that I love them so much."

On being naked:

"I spend most of my life naked. In fact, I often have to be told by the people around me that it's inappropriate to be as naked as I am. But I live in California, where it's always warm, so why not?"

There was also that time he said he wanted to kill everyone who made a celebrity fragrance.

BUUUUT, a year later, he revoked it to make is celebrity fragrance called "Adam Levine."

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YEAH YEAH YEAH. OK.

ALSO, he has a line at Kmart.

Looks douchey to me!
instagram.com

Looks douchey to me!

"Awesome."

And even more awesome.

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This is what he said about planes:

"I hate flying," Levine says. "Know why? Because no one really understands how planes actually work."

*Holds a Snapple*

Getty Images/ Jemal Countess

*Takes a poop*

Getty Images/ Christopher Polk/Staff

GOD.

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OK.

He's still hot. Like, he looks good in a tank top.

Getty Images/ Jamie McCarthy

And I would totally be like this little man and pet his chest.

Getty Images/ Scott Gries

And so help me GOD. This picture.

In conclusion, this tweet:

I'm done here.
Via Twitter: @adamlevine

I'm done here.