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91 Songs That Are Way Better Than Anything The Beatles Ever Did

The only list you need today.

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1. "Touch" by Little Mix

Would you rather four dusty old white dudes or four gorgeous vocalists that epitomize sisterhood? I'll take the latter.
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Would you rather four dusty old white dudes or four gorgeous vocalists that epitomize sisterhood? I'll take the latter.

2. "Into You" by Ariana Grande

"Into You" makes "Hey Jude" sound like fucking "Humpty Dumpty" (but worse).
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"Into You" makes "Hey Jude" sound like fucking "Humpty Dumpty" (but worse).

3. "Show Stopper" by Danity Kane

Imagine thinking music was at its artistic peak 50 years ago when the fact is music actually peaked 10 years ago with Danity Kane? Sad.
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Imagine thinking music was at its artistic peak 50 years ago when the fact is music actually peaked 10 years ago with Danity Kane? Sad.

4. Leighton Meester's gorgeous solo album, "Heartstrings"

5. Leighton Meester's masterpiece, "Good Girls Gone Bad"

6. Shania Twain's "Come On Over" album

7. Underrated ballad, "Nobody Wants To Be Lonely" by Ricky Martin & Christina Aguilera

8. Gayest remix of all-time, "It's Not Right But It's Okay (Thunderpuss Mix)" by Whitney Houston

9. "I Hope You Dance" by Lee Ann Womack

10. Literally just a supercut of Rupaul saying "Bring Back My Girls"

11. "Sparks" by Hilary Duff

Revolutionary and ahead of it's time. Not everyone (the Beatles) have a song like that!
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Revolutionary and ahead of it's time. Not everyone (the Beatles) have a song like that!

12. "Only Hope" by a dying Mandy Moore

13. The Cellino & Barnes telephone number

14. "Bossy" by Lindsay Lohan

15. "All Or Nothing" by O-Town

16. Just the beginning of "California" by Phantom Planet

17. Anything from the golden era of Sheryl Crow (1993-2001)

18. Anything from the movie Coyote Ugly

19. "Candy" by Mandy Moore

"Candy" is an iconic music video where Mandy Moore and some friends have milkshakes then break out into a choreographed dance routine in an abandoned swimming pool. The Beatles have...not that!
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"Candy" is an iconic music video where Mandy Moore and some friends have milkshakes then break out into a choreographed dance routine in an abandoned swimming pool. The Beatles have...not that!

20. "Cool For The Summer" by Demi Lovato

Literally changed the way we view a season.
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Literally changed the way we view a season.

21. "Work From Home" by Fifth Harmony

Literally gave a voice to freelancers everywhere.
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Literally gave a voice to freelancers everywhere.

22. "Me & You" by Cassie

Invented mid-2000s one-hit-wonders.
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Invented mid-2000s one-hit-wonders.

23. The Gullah Gullah Island theme song...

24. ...but especially Binyah Binyah's solo

25. "Pump Up The Jam" by Technotronic

26. "Ohh Ahh Just A Little Bit" by Gina G

27. "Get Low" by Lil Jon & The Eastside Boys

28. "Potential Breakup Song" by Aly & Aj

29. "For You I Will" by Teddy Geiger

30. "We Found Love" by Rihanna

Rihanna has experimented with rock, pop, dubstep, rap, r&b, and EDM. The Beatles just play guitars.
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Rihanna has experimented with rock, pop, dubstep, rap, r&b, and EDM. The Beatles just play guitars.

31. "Big Girls Don't Cry" by Fergie

Imagine writing a song so poignant it still holds up today. The Beatles wouldn't know.
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Imagine writing a song so poignant it still holds up today. The Beatles wouldn't know.

32. "No More" by 3LW

Let me know when the the Beatles have a group that can sing AND rap.
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Let me know when the the Beatles have a group that can sing AND rap.

33. "Believe" by Cher

Cher has had a musical career for like 72 years. The Beatles? Like two.
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Cher has had a musical career for like 72 years. The Beatles? Like two.

34. "S Club Party" by S Club 7

Did the Beatles have a wildly successful show on ABC Family? Nope. Next please!
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Did the Beatles have a wildly successful show on ABC Family? Nope. Next please!

35. "Hail Holy Queen" by the nuns on Sister Act

36. The Baby Bottle Pop commercial jingle

37. "Pizza in the morning, pizza in the evening, pizza at suppertime. When pizza's on a bagel you can have pizza anytime."

38. "Smile" by Vitamin C

39. "Dirrty" by Christina Aguilera

As far as I know, the Beatles wanted nothing to do with dirty, filthy, nasty shower clubs and leather chaps. Not very sex-positive to me!
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As far as I know, the Beatles wanted nothing to do with dirty, filthy, nasty shower clubs and leather chaps. Not very sex-positive to me!

40. "Buttons" by the Pussycat Dolls

PCD made middle school dances erupt into problematic and awkward grinding. The Beatles...not so much, maybe just Mrs. Smith awkwardly singing in the corner.
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PCD made middle school dances erupt into problematic and awkward grinding. The Beatles...not so much, maybe just Mrs. Smith awkwardly singing in the corner.

41. "New Rules" by Dua Lipa

Put this on in a gay club and the dance floor will fill up. Put the Beatles on and my Uncle Steve will start singing.
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Put this on in a gay club and the dance floor will fill up. Put the Beatles on and my Uncle Steve will start singing.

42. "Slumber Party" by Britney Spears and Tinasha

Call me when the Beatles host an illuminati lesbianonic orgy please.
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Call me when the Beatles host an illuminati lesbianonic orgy please.

43. The "Full House" theme song

44. The sound my phone makes when someone Venmos me

45. The Pure Moods soundtrack commercial

46. "Get Over Yourself" by Eden's Crush

47. "Friends Forever" by the Zack Attack

48. Anything from Jock Jams: Volume 1

49. "Go For It!" by Hot Sundae

Encouraged youth to work out. The Beatles...yeah, they just smoked a lot of weed. (Still cool).
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Encouraged youth to work out. The Beatles...yeah, they just smoked a lot of weed. (Still cool).

50. "My Neck, My Back" by Khia

Khia encouraged people everywhere to have their ass eaten. The Beatles didn't eat ass.
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Khia encouraged people everywhere to have their ass eaten. The Beatles didn't eat ass.

51. "Run Away With Me" by Carly Rae Jepsen

52. "E•MO•TION" by Carly Rae Jepsen

53. "I Really Like You" by Carly Rae Jepsen

54. "Gimmie Love" by Carly Rae Jepsen

55. "All That" by Carly Rae Jepsen

56. "Boy Problems" by Carly Rae Jepsen

57. "Making The Most of the Night" by Carly Rae Jepsen

58. "Your Type" by Carly Rae Jepsen

59. "Let’s Get Lost" by Carly Rae Jepsen

60. "L.A. Hallucinations" by Carly Rae Jepsen

61. "Warm Blood" by Carly Rae Jepsen

62. "When I Needed You" by Carly Rae Jepsen

63. "Another Dumb Blonde" by Hoku

Fought for blonde equality.
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Fought for blonde equality.

64. "Oh Happy Day" by Wesley from Sister Act 2

One of the most beautiful moments in cinematic history.
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One of the most beautiful moments in cinematic history.

65. "You Don't Own Me" by Bette Midler, Goldie Hawn & Diane Keaton from The First Wives Club

I mean, do I really have to explain why THIS is better than the Beatles?
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I mean, do I really have to explain why THIS is better than the Beatles?

66. "Express" by Christina Aguilera in Burlesque

Does anyone still talk about "Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band" movie because my (gay-ass) friends still talk about Burlesque constantly.
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Does anyone still talk about "Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band" movie because my (gay-ass) friends still talk about Burlesque constantly.

67. "Disco Tits" by Tove Lo

Tove Lo basically fucked a puppet in this music video. The Beatles were apparently not into "that sort of thing."
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Tove Lo basically fucked a puppet in this music video. The Beatles were apparently not into "that sort of thing."

68. Jessy from Little Mix saying "Ballegduh"

69. Britney Spears' Pepsi commercial

70. "Stars Are Blind" by Paris Hilton

71. "Nothing In This World" by Paris Hilton

72. My mom saying dinner is ready

73. The delivery man calling me and telling me he's downstairs

74. The voice on the subway saying there is a train approaching the station

75. "See You Again" by Miley Cyrus

Miley Cyrus released this when she was like 12. The Beatles released most of their work in their 20s. Think about that!
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Miley Cyrus released this when she was like 12. The Beatles released most of their work in their 20s. Think about that!

76. "Breakaway" by Kelly Clarkson

This is the look Kelly sported in the "Breakaway" vid. The Beatles wore raggedy old bellbottoms and ugly newsboy hats (I think).
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This is the look Kelly sported in the "Breakaway" vid. The Beatles wore raggedy old bellbottoms and ugly newsboy hats (I think).

77. "Dancing On My Own" by Robyn

Imagine liking the Beatles more than Robyn? That just awful.
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Imagine liking the Beatles more than Robyn? That just awful.

78. "Waiting For Tonight" by Jennifer Lopez

An anthem for the millennium. The Beatles were like in the '60s. Not relevant.
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An anthem for the millennium. The Beatles were like in the '60s. Not relevant.

79. The Kim Possible beeper

80. The Proud Family theme song

81. The Zoey 101 theme song

82. "What Dreams Are Made Of" originally by Isabella but later by Lizzie McGuire

83. Literally just Isabella saying "sing to me Paolo."

84. "All I Want For Christmas Is You" by Mariah Carey

Self-explanatory.
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Self-explanatory.

85. "Always Be My Baby" by Mariah Carey

Also self-explanatory.
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Also self-explanatory.

86. "Happy Birthday (Live From Singapore)" by Britney Spears

A new and exciting re-working of a classic. The Beatles could never.
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A new and exciting re-working of a classic. The Beatles could never.

87. When they do the dance to "The Rockafeller Skank" in She's All That

88. "F.U.R.B. (F U Right Back)" by Frankee

89. "Banging On A Trash Can" from Doug

90. Mr. Hyunh from Hey Arnold singing "The Simple Things"

91. And "Get Busy" by Sean Paul

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