In case you somehow missed it, Mariah Carey royally fucked up her New Year's Eve performance.
After the performance, people on the internet were screaming that Mariah was "over" or "the last casualty of 2016."
The thing is, that's all dumb bullshit. You are all wrong. Let me explain...
First of all, Mariah Carey has sold more than 200 million albums.
She has won five Grammy awards.
She has two beautiful children...
...and her kids will be friends with Beyoncé's kids, which means they will be, like, power kids or something.
She flies all over the world in private jets looking like this:
She can sing in five octaves and has been called the highest-pitched contemporary singer of our time.
In 2001, she signed an $80 million record contract with Virgin Records. In 2002, she was GIVEN FOR FREE $28 million to leave Virgin Records. That same year, she signed a $20 million contract with Def Jam. What does this mean? SHE'S RICH AS FUCK.