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Eva Mendes, You May Have Won The Battle, But You Haven't Won The War

Just a little note.

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HI, HELLO, HEY THERE. GOOD DAY, EVA.

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OK, you won.

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Congrats! Really, I'm happy for you. You did it!

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But I just have to say. I've read history and I know some things. While everything may seem really happy and great now, I'd just thought I'd give you a heads up.

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LET ME BREAK IT DOWN FOR YOU:

Your dog speaks French...

... Ryan's dog probably does not. George isn't into that shit.

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That's a problem.

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I also found this interesting article... it's very interesting.

That's a problem.

And another thing I heard about you is that your favorite food is bread. Ryan's favorite food is calamari.

That's a problem.

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So, while the battle may be won...

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... the war isn't over.

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The thirst will never be quenched.

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There will always be a map to ur man.

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Oh also, here's this picture and I don't know what it means but it concerns me.

Congrats!